Flight of The Paper Plane

Buhay Pa Me

2009-07-28T08:35:00.000-07:00

IAMBACK!:)
After almost five months of absence--rarandom rakenrol uli ako.
I missed everybody!

Liberty Potatoes

2009-02-18T01:58:00.000-08:00

[got this from http://scrapetv.com/News/News Pages/Business/images/mcdonalds-french-fries.jpg]

There's something about this picture. Obviously, it doesn't boast the food itself. Ang sad. I don't know. I felt so sad upon seeing this picture. Mcdo fries are my liberty potatoes. Sinful cravings.

When all the love has faded away

The full blown technicolor universe has turned into gray

When your eyes could no longer see beauty

You can still find these french fries and catsup no.4

For you to eat with me

DLSU-D

2009-02-11T01:16:00.000-08:00

Dasma girl for a day.

Random and unexpected/surprise meet ups do work good for me and for my good close friends here! DLSU-D had this event inviting its students and outsiders to form a big human Lasallian star (a big idc to the term they use:D). Well, I was not really interested with that event alone and so I did go. Ofcourse, all I wanted is to be with my Dearie and Lowlah. We've planned this day for yearss, as in! And I am so glad that Feb 12 paved way for the 'coming true' of that dream. Yehesss. Dream daw! Haha.

Dapat daw nakagreen. Boo! I really found it hard to find a green shirt. And! Napaparada pa ako. In fairness, I haven't joined any parade at UST except for that Thomasian freshman walk-welcome choochoo when I was in first year. And! While parading, God knows how hard I prayed for this onething and I was so happy and He heard my prayers. :) Nakaattend pa ako ng PR seminar. Lucky me.

Sabbie's doodle baby.
Grabeee. Ang laki kooo...:(

Happy Three. :D

Dearie Sabbie, Yanggee and Lowlah Kathee. c:

Remembrance!
Nasirang charger! Pokeballs from the seminar! Flaglet. Haha

Okay. Parang turista lang daw. Haha.

IAMNINOY

2009-02-05T01:08:00.000-08:00

I met Senator Noynoy Aquino today as well as Pampanga Gov. Ed Panilio. There was this symposium on heroism handled by Socio Society at UST Civil Law Audi and I took the privilege to attend with my good friends Patty, Bijei, Marion and Glenda. God knows how I love Ninoy Aquino! How I idolize him that's why I was so eager to listen to his son, Sen. Noynoy, as he talked about his father the way he knows him.

Noynoy remembering Ninoy Ate ni Noynoy (I forgot the name): Pa (Ninoy) I want to be like you.. Ninoy: ..and? Ate ni Noynoy: Gusto ko po sanang mag-aral sa UP. Ninoy: Ah, so gusto mo rin mag-UP.. okay.
Ate ni Noynoy: :)

---- Ninoy: Enroll mo siya sa Assumption!
Cory: Okay.

Ang funny. See, how protective he is to his family? Senator even recounted that before his father always opted to sit at the back part of their van. He just thought that fathers are really meant to occupy the back part of the van but came Martial Law that explained everything.

Ninoy Aquino is with no doubts a hero. The Philippines must be lucky to have had him. HE IS THE MAN. He is my inspiration. Ninoy is in each one of us. Let the Ninoy in us shine.

iamNinoy baller.
Post OptionsTHE FILIPINO IS WORTH DYING FOR-Ninoy

Febrauary Na!

2009-02-03T01:43:00.001-08:00

Halo there Sunshiness!

Did you miss me? I really missed you big time! :))
So how are you na guys? I really want to hear from you so I'm gonna blog hop later. Hihi. Drop some message on my chatbox ha!

So what about me now?
Well, I'm really having a good time so far! And please allow me to take the random stage now. Eto na!

Rarandom Rakenrol na ako!:D

I have a new number and cellphone. If you're close to me, you wouldn't wonder why I got my old phone lost to nowhere. But it doesn't mean I really *lost it. Haha. And! If you're close to me, you wouldn't wonder why it was so big deal to me changing my mobile number though I still have the old sim card. At dahil diyan.. PAHINGI AKO NG MGA NUMBERS NIYO. Panawagan. Anyways, tinataningan ni Daddy and Ate ang life span ng new fone ko. My Dad said, "Good for 5 months" while ate bet for four. DUHH. Papatunayan kong I'd be extra carefull na talaga this time. Help me Lord. :)

Bonding with my Dearie and Hannee!! I missed them both, subbeerr. I just feel so free and comfortable when I'm with them and with our friends. Parang kahit di na ako magsuklay or mag-ayos ay ayos lang. Yea, w I super enjoyed this night and madaling araw!

Who do you think is more femine? The real females or that gayish siopao?:D

We just love each other! c:

Patty and Dora are the reasons why Pao is still holding on to his 'being male.' That must be true love. Haha.

Hannee-Dearie-Yanggee

About school? Hmm, I'm so close to being an OJT-er. :) I'm excited but still I haven't decided yet where the hell I would work as a practicumer. Boo! Pray and shine on me Sunshinesss so I would know what to pursue! My dad wants me to be in the field of advertising. But all I wanted to do is to be in the field of UST and watch football players there and catch some Beato hotness. LOL. Kurni ko pa rin, diba? Yey! Wala akong sakit. Haha. But seriously, I feel so kabado din pala. Dug-dug. Goodluck to me and to all of us!!

My lovelife is still the same. I have no official 'Pyramus' or 'Romeo' or 'Popoy' or 'Jonathan!' and that doesn't make a 'Thisbe' whose story is being told by Greek Myth books or Juliet who once upon a time fought for her love and died for its sake or Basha who won again her true love or even Sarah of Serendipity who witnessed the wonders of fate, destiny and love as these elements brought her to her 'the one.' But being loveless doesn't make me feel so NOT in love. In fact, I am inlove. I am in love with just being like this. So true!:) But I am not closing my doors to anyone. There are some who I already talked with na friends lang talaga. It's better to be honest naman dibaa? And! I really have no qualms over their attitude. Spell gentlemen.:) And!! WE NEVER KNOW WHAT WOULD HAPPEN NEXT. Haha. Nagsecond thought. LOLOLOL.

February na! My day is on the 24th!:) Imma post my wishlist soon! Haha. Regalo koooo! :D Feb is my month! It's the Arts and Love month! I feel so lucky to be born on this month. Ewan ko ba. I reallyy loove Feb! Pero teka! Gift ko a. LOL. Haha. Gusto ko mga sining pieces. Lettersssssss!! Write me letters, poems or paint some love!:)

The Scientist

2009-01-23T08:52:00.000-08:00

It has always been that way. Talking about him only means contradicting myself. Okay, I wasn't really supposed to be here. I mean blogging here and talking to you now but I couldn't help get this thoughts released when my on shuffle mode iTunes played the song The Scientist by Coldplay.

Minutes before my January 23rd ended, the world where I wanted to believe I existed in was confirmed a fallacy. One thing was made clear to me. Thanks to you my dear sunshine. I don't wanna tell who that dear sunshine is but I am really thankful to that person.

Now I know.
Now I must stick to my game.

Ten days before it was confirmed to me, I made this resolution to veer away from the noise that had always been the sound of his name yet being honest to you guys would make me tell that that there were in between breaks of going back to him and to whatever it is that is him and about him. But I improved.

Now I know.
Now I must give the other him a chance.

This is truly a goodbye.
I shall continue my January 13th stint away from him.

So to my plurk which asked if he still cares, I now know the answer.
He doesn't anymore. HAHA. Ang bangbang truth but a nice one to ponder on. Many realizations to come my way, you're all welcome.

To you who'll always be my DOT sunshine, I am really sorry. Burn me in the terrace of pride that I gave in so many times to the wiles of this sin but I am really sorry. You're a lesson. Be happy now. I know you are. I just want you to know that you don't mean nothing at all to me. In fact, you almost meant everything to me.

SALAMAT HA. :)
BE IN LOVE, always.
For the last time I guess-- mwahugstsuptsup. :D

In Love or Bangag? It's a Landi Fest!

2009-01-21T05:03:00.000-08:00

I posted this blog entry first in my Multiply account. :)

2:56am

I missed running after Multiply's blogging dashboard whenever I resort to blogging. And that is after realizing that there's no better way to let my thoughts out than to blog and talk to myself as I hit the keyboard.

Yea. I have no cellphone now. Last friday, after spending some goodgood time at Intramuros with Jeyd, Gee, Johann and Glenda.. I lost my fone to my defect- (ehem ehem)-kaburaraan. Fine. I don't wanna talk about it again and honestly I don't want to use a cellphone ever again! Even Banana phones are not exempted to my clumsiness. After the fone stumbled all the way down the stairs of the underpass, I still got my sim card safe with me BUT I'm really considering to make my sim rest forever. I'll just inform you guys if I have a new number. I'm trying this cp abstinence for now. So far-- it's hard. Oh well, I'd tried internet abstinence before and I have to admit that it brought me some good benefits!

Moreover, everyone's sleeping here except my brother who just got home from a party. Huwwww. Does he really have many friends? So many that in almost everyday there's someone among his friends who's celebrating his/her birthday! Tsss. What a lame excuse my brother. Do it just like me- plain and simple.

Mommy: Bakit gabi ka na uuwi mamaya?
Yang: Uhm, kasi may shoot pa po kami. May editing pang gagawin para sa mga videos.

See? I'm sticking to the nature of my course. Plain and simple.

So okay. What now? WAA.

The whole world now welcomes the 44th president of the US, Pres. Barack Obama! I wish I was sitting somewhere near the Pres. Obama's seat right now. Teleport! Teleport to Washington DC-- enk..enk.. boom.. tuktuk.. "teleport-ing failed.. the one requested for the teleportation process is too heavy!" Screw teleportation! Since when you've started discriminating fat people? Haha!

OBAMA: Power alone can not protect us.
Yang: Agree! Agree! Because it should be power+rangers! Power rangers! Power rangers can protect us!
USA: That Filipina (ako daw!) is so corny! There must be many cornfields in the Philippines!!
Yang: Sino kaya mas cornie? DUH.

Nye-nye-nye-nye-nye!

Reality knocking on the door!
Toktoktok.
I'm actually writing my short story for Retoriksssss. And I am really thinking of what to write for my Literature paper. I have no concept and I can't even think of this thing I perceieve as a great loss in my life. So far-- so really farrrr!!

So now, I am standing somewhere in the space between dreams and reality. I am not afraid. I know I'll get this through and be able to link the two. Many horoscopes and blahblahs have told that I am a dreamer. Pisceans are dreamers. And in true life- I am a Believer. Sounds sucess?? No! It sounds like 'Starstruck!' Dream, Believe, Survive---Starstruck. LOL. Ang corny niyo!! Don't you know that? WEH?

Ooppsss!! Speaking of Intramuros (about the phone saying byebye).. nalunod ako! Nalunod ako sa sobrang dami ng guys sa Mapua. Hahahaha. Hmm, sige na nga.. it's a different story. Hihi.

O siya.
Wala ng tulugan to Sunshinesssssss.
Be my musa ebriwan!:)

NAKAKABUWIST YUNG TITLE.
Haha.
That was the first thing I typed in.
So stick to the-- TOUCH MOVE rule. :D

Super Random Me,
Yang

"O yes. That feeling. That feeling that pushes me to whisper only in my mind the words of desire to make him stay just for a while. A minute is enough. Two is more than what I prayed for. Three or more can possibly send me happy tears.."
-mi libro na walei pang titulo, haha. baklita!

Malapit Na

2009-01-19T06:25:00.000-08:00

WHAT DO I HONESTLY FEEL RIGHT NOW?

I feel so...

tanga
bobo
irresponsible
sensitive
left out
late
emo
pretentious
useless

Ang labo.
But that's what I really feel now.
Magkakaroon na siguro.
Oo nga pala, babae rin ako.

Tumatakas Patatas

2009-01-15T06:45:00.001-08:00

PARANDOM LANG PLEASE.

Eto ang mga panahong wala na akong pakelam kung batuhin ako computer kasi hindi naman niya magagawa yung diba? Haha. May computer ba na nambabato? Ngeeeeee.

Sa totoo lang dapat akong mag-aral for ADVERTISING: Copy and Lay-out dahil hello hello naman Yang! prelims mo na bukas sa Adburrr! Ang pinaka-ayoko kasi ay manggaling ang reviewer sa eleap. Arg. Once magnet na ako wala na, magbubukas ako ng ibang windows for my pleasure gaya nitong blogger. Haha. PATAY. Pero hindi rin, it's just tinatamad talaga akong mag-aral for Adver. Sabaw na kung sabaw pero ohnoes, bahala na si Vince O. Teves. Anu daw?:D Haha. Baliw.

Hay naku, sabi ni Katie Magno pumapayat daw ako. Ay hindi, ang payat ko daw! Kumain naman daw ako. Nabahala tuloy ako, e ang lakas lakas ko kumain! Tsaka, hindi kaya ako payat. Wish ko lang. Hahaha. May sakit kaya ako? Haha. Pero hindeee, konti lang naman sila nagsasabi. Baka ilusyon lang ni Katie yun kasi hindi naman talaga e. Haha. Sana di niya na uli sabihin yun kasi ilang bes niya na rin naulit dahil natatawa lang ako at minsan nagffreak out kasi di talaga bagay sa akin ang payat! Haha. Pangit!

Nagtext si Jeseli, sabi niya parang ang lapit daw ng buwan. Dahil may likas akong pagkatsismosa, lumabas ako para i-check kaso hindi ko agad nakita dahil natakot agad ako dahil ang dilim na sa labas e. Hahaha. Kasi panay kwento kami ng mga nakakatakot nila Anna and Marion. Loollss.

Parang nachachallenge na ang kampanya ko para sa positivity. Ohyea my Shine On Me Sunshinesss Campaign. I know this is just a phase at malalagpasan ko rin ito ng panalo. Wee. Prelims lang at nadadala kahit papano ng pressure pero hindi.. postibo pa rin dapat. Aja!

Nauwi ko na ang plaque ng Jingle of the Year Award. Yea. Sa wakas. Haha, may patunay na ako. Ching! Napalibre tuloy ako ng wala sa plano sa mga tao kanina samin. Buti na lang kikiam, squidballs, fishballs lang ang pinalibre. Haha. Babaw. Pero may treat naman si Mommy kanina, bumili siya ng paborito kong chicken for dinner. Naappreciate ko naman at sabi ni Ate gawan ko daw siya ad jingle. Haha, anu siya? Ibebenta? Baliw yun.

Nalulungkot din ako kasi masama ang aking pakiramdam. Huhu. Hindi ito pwede. Ang lamig naman kasi talaga. Dumagdag na tuloy ang pagligo bilang isang challenge sa buhay. Hehe. Ang sarap ng may kayakap. Huwwow, gumaganun ako? Haha.

Naaadik ako sa Love Drunk ni Amber Davis. Matagal na yung song pero nakakaaliw pa rin. Tapos yung mga songs ko these days ay Say Goodbye and syempre Crash Into Me pa rin ng Dave Matthews, Lifehouse's Blind, Warmth ng Incubus and my Coldplay paborito songs pa rin. Haha. Sparks, Warning Sign, The Scientist and Shiver!!! And naman, Breakeven ng The Script. Papakasalan ko talaga si Danny O'Donoghue e. Ngrrr.

Namimiss ko na ang BLVRS. Parang gusto ko talagang magyaya ng something bukas or ituloy ang kung anuman sa Sat kaso nagpamake up class pa si Atalia. Umabsent kaya ako? Tssss. Malabo! Namimiss ko na ang mga tambay! Ang ihaw sa Marjakes! Ang sofa nila Pao! Namimiss ko na ang mga super babaw na laughtrips at kwentuhan. Asssarrrr.

Gusto ko na talagang magpamake over. Pero hindi na rin. PagFeb na siguro, ang aking month. Oo, akin yun. Haha. Kasi ano kaya? Matagal tagal na ring hindi ko pinapakelaman ang buhok ko kahit ang pangit pangit na niya! Wuwww. Wala kasi aking maisip na papagawa. Hmm. Let's all see na lang kasi kapag umentra na ang 'Metanoia', voila welcom new me!

SEE YOU NEXT TIME PASSENGERS.
THIS IS THE PILOT OF THE PAPER PLANE.
ADIOS.
Salamat sa pagpaparandom. :)

DOT SUNSHINE, That's What You Are

2009-01-13T00:58:00.000-08:00

Well, I guess this is the day when all the planets and stars have decided to align themselves and tell me-

"HEY MS. GORGEOUS [walang pakelamanan. :D], you must take a big leap away from him and all the things that make you think that you can win him back. BECAUSE, you're just wasting your time for there are absolutely a lot of fishes in the sea. And come on, you just don't deserve him. You know that Dear Yanggee, we know you know that. So as the selfless fellow would say, GIVE CHANCE TO OTHERS.c:

It really feels so liberating that I am reconnecting with Venus now as I finally set myself free of him and whatever it is that brings me back to him. It's not that I surrendered or something. It's more of a realization that I shall COMPLETELY move forward. Of course, today has been a great day pushing me to that realization and I really thank God for this. Well, I have to admit that still I have this doubt in me whether tomorrow will make me feel the same- so away from him. But I do hope this is gonna be the a good start for my Venus-ial rebirth; me falling in love again but absolutely not with him. Enough of telling the whole wide world that I am a hopeless romantic! All the years have proven that. I shall now act my age. I shall now be willllllllld. Joke! Hahaha.

But seriously, I am saying goodbye now.

I know this does not matter to him. But to me, it does. It really does. I am not feeling anything bad against him. I even respect him and I am thankful too because I have learned a lot of things about the world, about me, about how far can I go and even about how shallow I am just because of him.

TODAY'S BIGBANG SNAPS:
The things I consider messengers for this day to wake me up and make me realize such things.

I finished reading Vince's Life book 2 at the bus going home and I felt somehow bad because the conclusion was not what i wanted to read. Andrea and Vince didn't end up with each other. [Sorry sa pagspoil ha.] See? Ang cheesy ko right? Though it hurts a lot for Vince and though the pain is killing him, I still wanted him to pursue Andrea instead of Cat who's obviously undeniably really in love with him. And it really upset upon knowing that he left Andrea, turned down the times that all he did was to wait and decided to give Cat a chance and chose to be happy.

THE CONNECTION: I should be like Vince. I was once like Andrea who's fond of hanging statements around the corner that just makes it harder for Vince to live anew. Seemingly, she wanted Vince to stay put and never move on though she doesn't state it clearly. I was once like her in the sense that I complicate things but now it's the other way around. Book 2 paves way for a turn table. Book 1 suggests that I am Andrea but now Book 2 says I am Vince and I should act like Vince. I should finally break from the norm that I myself had started. I shall welcome my own Cat.

I saw onething here in the Cyberspace. I don't know if I should be happy or not. But seems like now opt the latter. In the sense that I should not be happy becuase of that gesture hence be happy because finally I am heading to a COMPLETE moving forward.
This one's silly and funny but today, I just feel like so beautiful. And so I FEEL [just feel. :P] that many guys are looking at me just like yesterday. WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. And so welcome to me in a TEEEICH reloaded world.
I woke up into a Sunday morning with a smile on my face because I dreamt of him. Maybe it's his way of bidding me goodbye too. Ohyea, with his wink ending the dream-- It must have meant that he's now happy too. We shall all be happy. The whole world should be.

I am happy now. And I hope he is, too. I'm just asking the world to let him be one of my sunshinesss who all shine on me as I am graced by positivity.He'll be my 'Dot' sunshine foreverrrr.Because it's through the dots and series of periods where he fisrt told me that he loved me.

Just shine on me my DOT SUNSHINE dearrrrling!
Adios! :)

Reward System

2009-01-12T01:00:00.000-08:00

Having no stand between two pole doesn't reward you paradise. It's either you do good or do evil. So by that premise alone you shall start doing good. Our problem here presents choices and it's not a dilemma. For in choices, we just choose and that's it but with dilemma, it presents us a no win situation. Whatever we choose, there ought to be consequnces- chaotic consequences. So people, let's all be our own saviours. Let's all do good. Embrace goodness and positivity for always. :)

Press Button To Make This Dream A Reality

2009-01-11T02:53:00.000-08:00

Gumising akong nakangiti. Pakiramdam ko meron akong dapat pasalamatan. Naalala ko na, napaginipan nga pala kita. O sige, aaminin ko. Nakangiti ako dahil sa'yo. Kailangan kong pasalamat si Papa Jesus dito dahil:

Una, ang tagal na rin ng panahon na feeling ko wala akong napapaginipan. Wala akong maalalang panaginip.
Pangalawa, sa dinami dami ng panaginip na pwede kong maalala.. yung panaginip na kasama ka pa ang pinaalala sa akin.

Parang ang haba nga ng panaginip ko e.

UNANG TAGPO

MGA TAUHAN:

AKO
SIYA

Naglalakad ako sa Binakayan. Ang paborito kong lakaran. Ang stretch from 7-Eleven haggang sa amin. Gabi kasi madilim e at halos walang tao. Nakasalubong ko ata siya. Parang inimbitahan niya ako somewhere. Then, nagkahiwalay na rin kami.

PANGALAWANG TAGPO

MGA TAUHAN:

AKO
SIYA
IRENE, bestfriend ko

Hindi ako sure kung kaninong bahay iyon pero parang ang message ay sa bahay nila. Siguro inimbitahan niyo ako to come over his place.Gabi iyon. Magkatabi kami ni Ai. Tapos ang alam ko may nangyari pero parang di ko na talaga maalala. Pero andun rin siya. Parang inaasikaso kami.

PANGATLONG TAGPO

MGA TAUHAN:

AKO
SIYA
IRENE, bestfriend ko
JEYD, barkada
GEE, barkada
*****, kaibigan ni SIYA
MOMMY, nanay ni SIYA

Andun uli kami ni Ai sa inupuan namin. Pero ibang araw na iyon. Parang hapon nga 'yun e. Pinaupo muna kami ng Mommy niya and after noon pumunta si Mommy niya sa parang isang kusina and nanonood lang ng TV. Feeling ko nakita ko na yung lugar na iyon pero parang hindi. Then, nakaupo lang kami ni Ai. Then, nakita ko na lang na katabi na namin si Jeyd at Gee na nagcocomputer. Nagpplurk pa nga ata. Tapos biglang may dumarating. May mga tao din sa labas. Pumasok na siya na may dalang gamit. Ang alam ko ang pakiramdam ko noon ay nahihiya kasi wala naman kaming dahilan kung bakit kami andun. Di gaya sa 2nd na tagpo na tila inimbitahan kami. Tumungo lang siya. Nagyaya na akong umuwi. Ang daldal ni Ai, "Andyan na siya! Andyan na siya o! Dali!" Pero nagyaya na talaga akong umuwi. Bago kami tumayo, nakita ko si *****, kaibigan niya. Oo, yun lang yung role niya. Haha. Ang makita kong nakaupo. LOL.

KATAPUSAN

MGA TAUHAN

AKO
SIYA
IRENE, bestfriend ko

Naglalakad na kami pauwi. Parang ang haba ng lalakarin mula sa pinto ng bahay nila hanggang sa gate. Ang huli kong sulyap sa kanya bago kami tuluyang maglakad ay nasa labas siya at ,ay bitbit. Parang may practice na magaganap sa labas nila. Agad niyang binitawan yung dala niya. Hinabol kami at sinabayang maglakad. Para siguro ihatid kami pauwi. Ang naalala ko na lang ay nagthankyou kami ang nag explain pa daw ako kung bakit kami dumaan sa kanila. Sabi ko ay kinuha ko lang kina Jeyd ang iPOD ko. Ang nakakaloko dun ay sinagot niya ito sa pamamagitan ng isang KINDAT! HAHAHAHA. Funny! Oo kumindat siya at bigla na lang akong nagising!

OHA OHA! Ang haba nu? Pero nakakatawa ang panaginip ko. Kasi...

ANG SEY KO
[parang showbiz talkshow lang ang header.:D]

Hanggang sa panaginip ay sinungaling ako sa kanya. Pwede ko naman sigurong sabihin na pumunta ako doon para makita siya at hindi dahil sa iPOD. Haha, kasi sa aking pagkakaalala ay wala naman akong kinuhang iPOD kay Jeyd o wala namang "na kay Jeyd ang iPOD ko" na eksena. TSK.
Wala pa ring kupas. Ang dami pa ring paru-paro sa sistema ko pag nakikita ko siya.
Masaya ako talaga na naalala ko itong panaginip na ito at siya pa nga ay kasali dito.
Pero!!!! Hindi pa din kasi diba?? Panaginip lang e parang may pumitik agad at sabi "Hello Yang! Please go back to the start!" Ohnoess.
Ayun, sure thing naman ito e. Lagi ko na lang kinokontra sarili ko at ang mga statements ko pag siya na pinag-uusapan.
Sana may special button sa panaginip ko!! Sana may "PRESS BUTTON TO BRING HIM, THIS GUYS IN YOUR DREAMS, INTO YOUR VERY OWN REALITY." o kaya button na may "PRESS BUTTON AND WAKE UP TO THIS DREAM AS SCENCE EXISITING IN YOUR REALITY." o pwede rin na super ikli lang na.. "PRESS BUTTON TO MAKE THIS DREAM A REALITY." o pwede rin super super super super ikli na.. “PRESS BUTTON TO BE HAPPIER.”

DEAR MUSA SUNSHINES

2009-01-08T07:19:00.000-08:00

HAVE SOME DADA MUNA
The months of the last quarter of the year 2008 were all witnesses of how I was driven by this madness called negativity. I even got to the point where I thought to myself that success is only driven by fear. You fear things to happen and so here you are, doing things at your best stance to prevent anything you don't want to happen to get into the realms of reality. But here I am right now beaming with so much happiness to tell you guys that from negative zone I went all the way through the zero line and now I'm here still going up to the very heart of positivity.

ETO NA!
I know that this won't be possible without the help of some dear friends and the persons who all came my way that brought so much difference to my life now. And now, I wanna share you this night that I really believe closed the nega chapter of my book.

ETO NA TALAGA!!
It was December 12, 2008, Friday night.
Normally when it's Friday and the class is done, I am in a rush. I always wanted to go home already since Saturday classes pave way to a murderous 8 am class start. But that night was different from the others. I stayed and even ate dinner with Anna at the Car park. It was already 7:30 that time as I remember but still I stayed and even sat down inside the AB pav. I promised myself that when the clock strikes 8 I have to bid goodbye but seconds after that pact, Anna and I saw Maggie, Patty and Auds coming out of the AB Building. Of course, they made my pact a bit harder to be taken seriously and little did I know that I was already walking with them towards McDonalds due to Aud's request and even agreed with Maggie to drink. But it seemed like it was only me and Maggie who really wanted to drink. So the plan was aborted, haha.

ETONG ETO NA!!!
After that Mcdo dinner they had, my promise to myself to go home already went away together with the food they ate and got digested inside them. We even went to the field and that's where I got this news that boomed the night even more! Jeseli said that Glenda's with Ms. G and Andro at Tapsi. Then I read Glenda's message telling me that she has this surprise for me but Jeseli the spoiler got me first and so I already knew the surprise. Of course, it's all about Ms. G and Glenda knows how I love this professor.

ETO NA, HAHA. SWEAR!
So I guess this was the real reason why God didn't allow me to go home early. He prepared these creatures that night and be great instruments to bring some positive difference to my life. I really got thrilled by the idea that Maggie and I's idea to drink would become possible and more to that Ms. G would be with us, too. Waaah. Sitting around the table was me, Ms. Guevara, Glenda, Maggie and Andro and later came Carmela and Poch. Ms. G really is a rockstar!! I really learned a lot of things from her that night. Listening to her was heaven and is still heaven. Since I was really bugged by this lost drama I had then, I couldn't help but share. Her words tapped my shoulders, really. I even cried! See, that's how affected I was by that nega problem I had then. Ms. G. told me that I should not be afraid. Part of being lost is not giving the whole you to the things you do. There's this holding back that eats you and pushing you away from the path you should take. THROW YOURSELF TO THE UNIVERSE AND THE UNIVERSE WILL CATCH YOU, she said. And I got so deeply moved by it and so tears came out my eyes. She even assured me that I'm not a quitter after sharing a plan.

SHUCKS
But that night wasn't just all about me. Ms. Nerissa Guevara cried too!! Until now, I'm still affected by this story of hers that she shared with us. It just made my admiration for her stronger and purer! I just really can't believe that something like that had happened to her! She must be really strong for standing still and having such a wonderful attitude towards life! And I really appreciate the trust that Ms. G. has given us! She even shared with us a glimpse of her love life! And again.. for the nth time.. she did it again.. she amazed me. That guy really is sooo lucky. Hmm. We will pary for your lovelife Ms. G! And I definitely agree with her statement that ART IS THE CLOSEST PLACE TO HEAVEN. So we must follow our hearts because by that alone, we already do some art!

THE GRIPO
After that night, the faucet has started to keep on flowing with positivity. I really learned a lot from her. Honestly, i couldn't tell here all the details due to two reasons. Human's memory is fragile. Secondly, memories of that night are too good to be imagined not to be written. All I know is that came after that night is the first product if these heaven sent realizations, awakening and sorts.. the Jingle fest!

THANKYOUS
It's possible right? To have a person who you don't know all your life to change your track through words. Words are really powerful. And words from a person full of sense do count! Here are my thankyous for the people who keep me going this college phase.

MS. G, thank you for I now have an idol who I can see regularly and talk to and with for times and be proud to say that even just for a night, I was able to see her cry, hear advices from her, laugh with her, drink some beer with her, have FUN with her and feel so high!! You are an inspiration. You're story is safe with us. I admire you even MORE for that! Isa po kayo sa mga musa ko. Musa; those that truly inspire me to pursue the callings of my heart.

GLENDA, you never know how much you mean to me! Just like what Ms. G told her friend.. IT'S THE ARTIST IN YOU THAT BRINGS THE ARTIST IN ME. I admire you for so many reasons! You inspire me to continue my craft though at times, I put my faith in myself six feet under! Always believe in yourself because I don't want to have an idol who doesn't believe in herself. Did I just tell you that you're one of the persons who I look up to? Swear. I am really looking forward to this day when all our lives revolve just around our happiness-- OUR FAMILY, FRIENDS, IMPT. ISSUES TO KEEP US GROUNDED AND OF COURSE, OUR CRAFT. :)

Anna! You're the reason why I cried one crazy night in Plaza Calderon. I was so busy then polishing the doublemint ad jingle with Chad when you sent me this tear jerker message. It made me more confident! I OWE YOU A LOT. I am so lucky to have known such a wonderful and talented dancer that you are. You keep me going! You're so positive and I happily blame you for having me joined the band of positivity! I can't wait to see you as the next T. Jeorcelle. It's not far from possible. I believe in you.

GGALS, you all make UST such a heaven. I am always grateful to have known wonderful persons like you. You are my sisters!!!!!!!!!!! Tatanda na tayo together!! :)

TO EVERYONE, thanks for shining on me! Just continue on shining on me dear sunshinesss. Stay in love!

PATULOY AKONG MANINIWALA

2008-12-30T08:52:00.000-08:00

It has really been a SUPER long time since I haven’t blogged. But that does not mean that I had nothing so splendid to share nor had some exciting experiences to share and get immortalized as I post them here. It’s just, I find no *musa* to to push me into clicking the dashboard, start typing my thoughts into words and later on post an entry. So now I guess you’re wondering what finally stroke my heart that I am talking to you right now.

Oh well, I just came home from a party. I was with my BELIEVERS family and sure thing— I REALLY HAD A GREAT TIME WITH THE KOALAS. When I say GREAT I actually mean… GRRREAAAATTTT. I really missed them. :’) Before all of us parted ways, I asked them to write on my *musa canvass* and I was glad that there were people [because not all of them was was able to write on it] who were able to put the things they wanna tell me on my blacky.

And now.. their heartfelt doodles are the cause of these tears that were pushed by my heart out of my eyes. Their words are the cause why I’m now right here, blogging again, feeling so loved and filled with so much joy and appreciation. I SO LOVE THEM. :’)

The first thing I read was the letter from Alex but I opted not to finish the whole letter since hers is the last one amongst all. So I started reading my note for them which reads:

I LOVE KOALA BELIEVERS! <3<3>

I know 2008 had been a hard dive for us but see? Our diving and swimming skills had been guided and so nothing stopped our breathing. Glory, love and gratitude be given to HIM; Super friend.

SOORRRYY for all the shortcomings, CHANGES, and even by being ‘me.’ I know nobody can embrace someone wholly. There must be some space for withdrawal. Nega ba? Basta.. I’m sorry!! But with the things that have hurt you, I assure you my sincerest apology. I’m sorry for being me.

I love you guys! Let’s raise our hands to a better 2009 filled with more UBE moments, bonding galores, love, patience and UNDERSTANDING.

I just want to grow old with you. :)
You guys really mean a lot to me.

REMEMBER: Throw yourselves to the universe and the universe will catch you!

Napahaba na ata ang message ko. Hahahaha.

You are my sunshinesssssssssssss guys! Shine on me! MORREEEEE. XD

xoxo,
Yanggee

Then I jumped to reading all the messages. OEMGEE. I cried like a child! Crying had never been this so heartwarming. I really love them. I realized so many things while reading their messages and even after I read all those.

I would really want to ask apologies again for the things that pulled out my craziness that pushed me to hurting some of you. I AM SO SORRY. I realized that no matter what happens, I’ll always go back to you. To the persons who accept me no matter what. You are one of the strongest reasons why I’m still alive. It’s cheesy I know but I speak of the truth. You guys really move me. I love you so much. I could not think of ways on how to thank the Heavens for sending bunch of crazy creatures like you that likewise take the sanity out of me to the stream of a wonderful friendship. I’m crying again. I want to thank everyone who wrote in my book. You’ve given me more reasons to continue living and not existing.

Sab, to your message that deeply moved me- thank you. I am so glad that you know that I’m not only here for you but the rest of the B-family. I don’t know what exactly you wanna say on the first part but please, don’t do something bad to yourself. Thanks too for trying your best to be strong. Time heals all wounds as they say. I appreciate the honesty. Don’t just move on— MOVE FORWARD. I trust you Dearie, I do. Learn to be happy for yourself and for others. Dada! Yours was a laugh trip but still it made me cry. I missed you more! I am happy for you now that you have Vic. You’re blooming and the main reason must be him. I’ll stay pretty and sexy. Wahaha. Feeling? I love that part huh! But I do love you more. Stay safe, too. Dhesai! I hope you understand why I reacted that way when I learned that you’re not coming. It’s just I want you to be there with us. I agree! We should have MORE bondings this new year. Thanks for kissing my love life good luck! I love you, too! Joycie, thanks too for kissing my love life good luck. Don’t worry, when the right one comes along, you’ll be one of the first persons to know. Thanks for everything, too!! I was really touched with this, “Ikaw ang STAR ng BLVRS,” and again it made me cry. To whatever reason why you said that, thanks Joycie! Hugs. I love you moreee! Thanks for always being there. I hope to get closer to you this coming year. I hope to have more bondings to come. Kathee! Super thanks for the message!!!! It was a past blast! Haha. I remember almost everything about our cat-dog friendship. But I am really thankful like you for those nonsense fights because look at where we are right now, enjoying a stronger friendship guided by Him. I’m always here for you. Thanks for everything! Gee, I never saw your friendliness even during those CDGC days as pagpapansin!! It’s destined! We’re destined to be friends and you’re destined to be a part of this family. I love your energy too!! Thanks for appreciating my bubbly personality. I just so love you! Thanks for the wonderful friendship. Keep on shining! Jeyd, it’s the artist in you that brings out the artist in me! I’m also looking forward to another ARTSY SESSION with you. One of the things I hope 2009 could bring into my life is this wonderful soul cultivation of art through people who love their craft no matter how small the society thinks of what they do. You are one of them! I believe in you and your craft! Thanks for trusting my ideas. Yea right! “Let’s indie film!” Haha. Take care of the techies. Love you! Alex!! I’m sorry too! I just wanted to hug you after reading your message and I must admit— you really really made me cry as in super. Maybe because I share the same sentiments, I JUST SIMPLY MISSED YOU. I realized a lot of things and I really want to say sorry for the things that I said that may have hurt you. Thanks for understanding. Thanks for the holidays and I reconnected with you. All I want is to save you guys from pain and hurting but with that it seems that I am asking too much to myself. There are things that I could not spare and I’m sorry for that. I just love you and again I’m sorry for everything. I’m at peace now. Thanks and you know that I’m still here. I really want to thank you too for making me feel that you’re still so near me. Never think that I’ll turn my back on you and to everyone. You are so dear to me.

Have I told you that you guys inspire me?
You guys spell L-O-V-E.

Oo na ang arte ko.
Pero love ko kayo e.

SHE MADE MY NIGHT!

2008-11-24T08:03:00.000-08:00

DISCLAIMER: Feeling ako, sige na. Okay. Ang OA ko. Okay, sige tatanggapin ko. Masyado ko naman dinidbdib, sige thought considered. Pero totoo ito. Ito talaga ang nararamdaman ko. :) Mas mahalaga namang magpakatotoo, diba?

SHE: Lit. Professor. Who I started to call AIRY in my mind. Airy not because she's mayabang. AIRY is just a melange of two words that convey how I see her, ART FAIRY. Believe me, she does artsy wonders. :)

She made my night for reasons I want to be kept burning inside my heart. Ay grabe, IDOL ko kasi siya. It's so easy for me to fall in love with artsy people and not the fartsy. Malalaman mo naman e if someone does really know his craft. Grrr. That's why I really appreciated what she said! Coming from a newly idolized patron? Tssss. Sarap lang.

SORRY
This one might sound eerie
But my heart is jumping not because of the merit
It's the person who actually said it

Guys! Keep yourselves motivated. Minsan, hindi masama magfeeling. Haha. :)

Drifted

2008-11-18T22:12:00.000-08:00

At this moment, I can doodle on my head the saddest and most frustrated lines produced by my weary heart who doesn't even want to give anyone around her benefit of the doubt.-SO SAD.

I just want to escape away from these feelings.
It's been a while since I haven't laughed a real laughter. This is not to make anyone who I got to laugh with during the past few days feel bad. I hope you guys understand.

ITLOGATION

2008-11-18T02:18:00.000-08:00

etel-arnie-princess-yang

Sa side ng family ng Mommy ko, kaming apat talaga ang magkagrupo. We used to have so many OVs sa Las Pinas dati na sobrang saya balik balikan! I really had wonderful childhood years dahil sa kanila! Ako ang bunso ng grupo. :) The eldest is Etel then Arnie, Cess and me. We call ourselves the ITLOGATION. San nga ba natin napulot yun? Hehe.

Any-hoo, according to Mama Taba, our beloved Lola:

Etel-23, MATET [kamuka niya kasi si Matet de Leon lalo na nung bata]
Arnie-23, MATUTINA [ang tining kasi ng boses]
Princess-20, PURUNGGAY [ewan ba namin. baboy form ng name niya]
Yang-18, TABA [eh ang taba ko lang lalo na nung bata. :)]

Hay! But the UBE moments stopped when I was in highschool though me and Ate Arnie still used to go out and have some food trips and all that. But now! Here we are again, reunited and ignoring the changes we all went through! HAHAHA. :D

Etel
-Sobrang bongga! Ladies and gentlemen, si Etel po aka Rachel ay si Rodel na ngayon. Haha. Yap! From a pretty girl she's now a lesbo. BUT WE STILL LOVE HER NO MATTER WHAT!

Arnie
-Wow. Among the other three, siya ang pinakaclose ko. :) She's now a mother. A hott momma to Bookie. And syempre, lahat kami ninang ng baby boy niya.

Cess
-Hahaha. I honestly love her attitude. Kaso sobrang happy go lucky e. A brainy party girl. :) Loka-loka lang talaga!!

Yang
-I don't know how they think of me now pero whenever there's a hot topic, hahaa. Minsan I notice na nahihiya silang i-blurt out lahat kasi baka daw hindi ko carry. Ano ako? Super conservative? LOL. Or dinadaan lang nila sa age kasi ako pinakabata? Hehe.

I am so happy! Nagkasama uli kami kanina. Birthday ng girlfriend ni Etelogs! HAHA. FUNNEE. Pero yun kasi e. Hay! Then movie marathon. :)

Si Arnieng batungbakal na nasa disco kasama si Purunggay. Harharr

Bakit ayaw magpapic ni Etelogs?? KJ!

FOREVER itlogation. :) Kahit pa may 'bookie' na rin kami.
E ikaw Etelogs, ready ka ba dun? Hahahahahahhaahhaha. LAAB.

Happy Birthday Mi Abuela! :)

2008-11-16T19:14:00.000-08:00

Tito Robert, LOLA BICOL and Lolo Bicol in the photo frame (hihi. :D), Tito Rodel and Dezzie, representaive ni Tita Marivic!

Ano kaya ang pakiramdam ng hindi mo alam ang birthday mo? Hmm.
Sad diba? Parang di ka complete!

That's why the whole family is now so happy because finally, my Lola celebrated her real birthday after 73 years!! Mahabang story!! Naku basta, masaya kami talaga! :))

We threw a surprise party for her. Hindi niya talaga alam. Cool! Ang akala niya pinapunta siya samin dahil may impt na pag-uusapan. Di nga nya napansin yung videoke sa labas e. Haha. :D Nasurprise siya. Saya!

Good job to us pinsan [Dezzieee]. :)

Victoria Obrero, happy birthday!!: ))

Lola: Yang, tanggalin ko muna ang salamin ko!
Yang: Ayaw! Mas gaganda ka sakin.
Kaya, smile na lang Lola!

My 'Obrero' cousins.
Sisters Mia and Dianne and Dezie my laabs. :)

Dahil parang first bday ni Lola, party like kids tayo! Haha.
See my Daddy-yo? Todo bigay yan!
E sina Tita Cherry and Tito Bert on the side? Aw, di yan papatalo.
Hahaha. :D

Ate Anna and Ate Sheng.
They haven't met each other for like... uhm, yearsssss.
UBE sila o. Obviously, haha. :D

Rainbow In Our Hearts

2008-11-12T22:18:00.000-08:00

It really feels so damn great when you're with your friends who don't give a damn if you say something that if the world hears you, you might get cursed. Oh well, GGIRLS always make me feel so loved and so blessed. I love you girls. And the group will never really be complete without our PROBINSYANA, Mela-er. :) It's her birthday! I do admire her for a lot of things. Yes, include on the list her bipolar twists because without that, she'll never be the person who I learned to love from the start. She loves sweets, magazines and music and gaaahhdd she loves fashion, too. And not to forget! She loves Pocholo and that Pocholo guy will be forced to jump off a cliff once he does a no-no thing to her! Haha. Chos Poch!

Tha lovapaloozahh-rs. :)

Rainbow rushes Mela to the stars. :) I hope someday she'll have her own sort of rainbow through the kids that Pocholo would give her. Yes! The kids will bear the names that Poch once GMed to the world. Swweeeett.

I just hope for happiness to be planted in her. And so as it grows, she'll share happiness to the world. A REAL HAPPINESS. :)

Happy birthday Melabs! I TERRIBLY MISS YOU, former blockmate! But I will always love and be here for you, Ggirl. :)

Me lighting the kandila. Maligayang bati!!

Ganon kabilis. :) Hahah!

Conti's naman! AY o! ANg saaarrraaap!

And for Mela's day, CAKE FELLOWSHIP naman. Bow.

WE LOVE YOU!:)

NANGHIHINAYANG TALAGA AKO!

2008-11-12T06:15:00.000-08:00

"Hanggang anong oras kayo sa Sat? Gusto mo sumama sakin?
May icocover ako sa Nat'l. Museum.
Grace Nono's THE SHARED VOICE: Chanted and Spoken Narratives from the Phil.
Nov. 15, Sat, 3p,@ Nat'l. Museum Fundacion Hall."

-Glenda, photographer, The Flame

Yan ang pinaka-unang text message na nabasa ko kaninang umaga. Wuhoo. Naexcite ako! I thought to myself na- Yehes! Another mala-David Hwang experience uli to. KASO. This'll be on Saturday.

Saturday! Saturday! Wah! That's the reason why I hate ca3 schedule though parang every week ay sembreak dahil DUH, my sked for this semester is MON-FRI-SAT. Wow. Sana nga like the other sections na lang na M-W-F! At least, there are no Sat. classes! Very crucial pa naman ang mga Sabado sa buhay ko.

Hay. Palpak! I really wanna attend that event! :( Kurni talaga!

Buti na lang may konswelo ako kahit papano pag Sabado!

Thanks to Spanish Class na ngayon ay under Seniora na. Mas natututo talaga ko.

And!! Syempre!!

Sir Eros Atalia!:) Hahaha. Swerte namin and prof namin siya this sem!

You Alone

2008-11-11T05:51:00.000-08:00

Huwag na sanang lumayo pa ako. Nararamdaman ko uli yung pagka-uhaw. Ang sarap. Huwag Mo muna akong painumin. Hayaan mong ganito ang nararamdaman ko Sa'yo. Sana magtuloy tuloy na. Sana ito na yung matagal ko nang hinihintay na pagbalik. Ayoko na maulit yung dati. Hindi na sana tayo magkalayo. Alam ko kasing Ikaw lang sagot sa lahat ng ito.

MASAKIT

2008-11-11T05:08:00.000-08:00

Grabe. I am crying like a child now. I know it's my fault. Kasalanan ko and I had fallen yet again to the wiles of someone who already caused me sufferings before. Bakit ba kasi ganon? Madali ba akong mauto or I just couldn't draw the line between what's right and kung ano na ang sobra pagdating sa pagtanaw ng utang na loob. :(

Dati, I let myself weep and have a lot of troubled sleeps and even sleepless nights and siya ang dahilan nun. He made me believe that I was in a situation na sobrang hirap lagpasan and in order to do that, I had to do something na mahirap sa bulsa. Wow. Naloloko pa rin pala ako sa pera? E wala na nga akong pera. Wow. Grabe. Halos di na ako magkaugaga dati para lang don and gaaahhd I never want that phase to re-occur again in my life. Believe me, nakakabaliw. Hindi maganda. Worse is that it happened during the hoildays. Not only I needed more money because of the season but also, I wanted some peace of mind for the break. Para sulit naman but I was deprived. Saklap.

Then now. Naiipit ako. Huwww. Ipit talaga. Nauto na naman ba ako? Magaling lang ba talaga siya and I'm just too weak? Ayoko na. Yes, he helped me to be where I am standing now and that premise holds me so much that I give in easily to his talks and other blahs. Sakit e! This time, hindi na biro e. But I don't know.

All I know is that what I wrote in here all came from my crying heart right now. SOB*

Gerbils Can Fly!

2008-11-10T21:59:00.000-08:00

It feels great that there are still other girls who can qualify as a G-girl. Haha. Parang super high profile group lang a. Well, as they say "BIRDS OF THE SAME FEATHERS GO FLOCK TOGETHER." So we have another bird! Haha. :) She just proved that gerbils can be birds, too. LOL. Let's fly high! Gerbil fly!

Happy birthday Maggie Cortez! :)

She celebrated with her new family! I was so happy. Kumpleto kami and I really like Aud's new dorm. Super pwedeng venue sa kung anu-anong plan. Haha. Maggie treated us! She bought a gallon of ice cream. TSARAP. Cowboy style ng kainan! Kaya love ko sila e. :) Weee!

Kwetuhans I really miss!! Inside Aud's new unit sa Chumbayan street. Hihi.:D Ggirls love the place!

Eto na! Let's start the ICE CREAM session! Yumm!
L-R: Jeseli; new ggirl too!:), Maggie; the bday girl, Mela; ang pinakabentang magscoop ng ice cream-i loveeet, Chuch; the ever lovable and yours truly. :)
PLUS! Glenda's hands and reloj.

Galenda and Yang. ENJOYING the cam and the atmosphere! Kumpleto ang UST ggirls chapter!:D

Walang mag-aaway ha? :) Hehe!

Sinong nagsabing hindi natin mauubos? Hmmm.

Go Glends! Hahah. :D

Taob!!Sarap lang. :D Brownie Hazelnut Aykrim!:)

THE GERBIL POSE.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!:)

Maggie: This is my first birthday to celebrate with the ggirls.
ERRATUM!!! This is your first birthday as a ggirl. :)
Yoowwn!

*All pics from Anna De Leon

Firsts For A Long Time

2008-11-09T22:41:00.000-08:00

I woke up feeling so tired. Hang over, that's what I had this morning. I slept around 5:15 am and the alcohol spirit was still playing inside me as I laid down and slept.

Mom asked me if I'll go with them to Rotonda for the baptismal celebration of her pamangkin and I said I couldn't, my head was aching. I knew she thought that it was a major headache but I did have no qualms over that so she wouldn't insist to drag me along.

I was left with Dad and Kuya Mac. I had my firsts today! Firsts SINCE a long time I mean. :)

*to prepare lunch
*to wash dishes after lunch with Daddy and Kuya Mac
*to go to the church -IT'S SO BAD THAT I, MYSELF, PAVED WAY FOR A SINFUL ACT BUT IT FEELS GOOD TO BE REUNITED.
*to spend time with Dhes which I usually did before
*to cook tuna pasta ALONE since there was no one to cook for the three of us
*to sleep early on a Sunday night for a Monday class. I have Monday classes this second sem.

With Dhes! We shared a lot of MCDO meals together before! Mukha na nga kaming Mcdo at Mcfloat that time e. Haha. Isang text lang, meet up na agad sa Mcdo. Waah. Good old days! Namiss ko siya and it really feels so good that I was with her kanina sa church and some food tripping. :D

Happy Birthday Kuya!

2008-11-08T22:32:00.000-08:00

Ang kaisa-isahang lalaki sa aming tatlo.
Happy 22nd Birthday! :D

Madalas kaming mag-away. Hobby na ata namin ang badtrip-in ang bawat isa but I know, we do really love each other. Nasakto lang na that's how we show our feelings. Saya diba? Pero it feels so incomplete kapag walang pang gugulo nya. Anyhoo, I wish all the best for him. At syempre.. GOOD HEALTH. Ikaw ba naman ang uminom ng uminom? TSSSSS. Lablab! :)

Second Sem Naaaa!! :)

2008-11-07T21:00:00.000-08:00

Wow! First day of second sem! Pag-enter ko pa lang sa Dapitan UST High gate, I saw my crush. :) Whatta welcome! My first class which was supposed to be Theater Arts was suspended that technically made my day to start at 3:00 pm for the next subject, Advertising.

I met my girls inside the library. Ca2 people were busy then for the RES-MF task under Mam Tuble. Glenda, who doesn't belong to the now ca2 just like me *sob*, was there too and we didn't pretty much have any serious matter inside the lib and so we just went out and headed straight to Manong Lugaw in Rosaritos that I really missed. :) I love the lugaw and the tokwa! Yumm.

After that, we got to watch a GREAT play for free. Yes, it's great and I really want to congratulate Gian, the director, for a job well done. :) Hugs Gian!

My Adver class' first day was good. First time to be under Mam Bondoc and well I hope for a good sem with her though I heard nega blahs about her! Haha.

But that day would never be able to make me happy in UST without having my Ggirls spend time with me! :) Glenda, Jeseli, Anna and I had some reunion with our favorite siomai- CHUMBAYAN! Then we went back to AB that paved way for a nakakatakot na kwentuhan with the girls and this time together with Melabs, Poch and Blaeson! Haha. Afterwards, the Ggirls were sweetly completed as Patty, Auds and Maggie finally came over from the lib! Imagine how long they were in the lib? Ngrr. Good students! We left them there around 12 pm and they just went out around 6!

Happy!!:D

Not only had I officially started my second sem.. I also had a great time with the people that turns UST into a place much like heaven. :) Graaabeee. God bless second sem!!

Mark's Treat

2008-11-06T06:37:00.000-08:00

Nakahiga pa ako sa kama nang naisip kong meron akong blank day ahead kahapon. Ang sarap gumising ng tanghali pero ang contra-perk ay ang pagsakit ng ulo. Pagcheck ko sa fone ko may nagtext na number lang. Woot. Si Mark Nelin Ilano pala. Nag-iba ang mood ng araw. Ang akala kong wala lang na araw kahapon ay naiba, umalis daw kami.

Nagyaya siya sa MOA. Treat daw niya. Okay lang. Sabi ko wala naman talaga akong pera. Sabi niya okay lang. Ching! Meron ako. Haha. Test lang. 1pm niya ako susunduin sa amin.Yang, Cj and Mac-The Man of the blog!:D

Habang naliligo ako, naisip ko- tinatamad ako umalis. Humirit ako, sabi ko kahit SM Bac na lang or kahit McDo treat lang. Okay daw. Sinundo niya ako. Hirit ako ng walkathon sa barangay para iabot ang mga tshirts ng kagawad ko. Naisip ko nang mangyayari ito..

Barangay people: Chairman! Boyfriend mo?
Barangay people: Chairman! Baka magalit si JR niyan! Kasama mo pa boyfriend mo.

Wow. Ganon talaga. Hindi sila sanay na may kasama akong guy alone na bago sa mga paningin nila. Wow. Nadawit pa ang pangalan na JR. Tawa na lang. Haha.

Ang daldal ni Mac pero syempre di ako papatalo. Nyee. Pumunta kami sa SM Bacoor. Humirit siya na movie daw kami. WALA. Walang maganda. Wala na kaming magawa, sabi niya ituloy na daw ang MOA. Ay grabe, hindi ko na lang namalayan, nasa MOA na kami.

Wala pa rin kaming gustong panoorin. Nagbaboy na lang kami ni Mac sa BK. Bumaha ng fries. Hindi ito exage! Hindi ko naubos. Ang daming kwento! Pero mas marami siyang kuwento! Talo niya ako. I hate itttt! Haha. Namiss ko si Mac! Kahit madalas kaming hindi magkasundo nito, kahapon— positive vibes lang!

Kasi siguro sagot niya LAHAT. Bigtime e! Haha. Ching! Positive kasi siguro mas inappreciate ko siya. Na-emo na nga rin ako kagaya niya kasi naisip ko ang sarap kasama ng someone for you ng ganon-ganon lang. Easy times lang at chill habang kwentuhan and everything. Pero hindi naman umabot sa point na nasabi ko sa sarili ko na.. “Mac, sana si Ano ka na lang.” Haha. Sama!

Anyways, thankful ako sa afternoon na iyon! :) I love Mark in some ways! Haha. Alam naman niya. Next time uli ha!

Okay rin yung ganito. Bawi bawi sa guyfriends ko through going out. Nakasama ko na si Kevin one Sunday at naisipang manood ng Virgin Labfest play sa CCP. Kahapon si Mark. Well, madalas naman si Pao. Hmm, sino kaya sunod?

Happy, Not The Toothpaste

2008-11-04T12:38:00.000-08:00

I always dream of a life lived with happiness. A kind of happiness that’s not trapped between two dreadful choices and a kind of happiness that does not ask for anything in return.

Life always offers us a choice. And we choose accordingly. But sometimes the things we choose are far from what reallly makes us all happy. We choose things that post fake smiles on our faces. Why? Because we think that these choices are the right choices? Who are we to tell? The rightness and the wrongess of a choice, as I believe, is still subjective to the circumstances. Can we consider a choice right if it tears our hearts into pieces? Is it still right if it kills you slowly with your full awareness?

I guess it’s not bad to spoil yourself at times and do yourself a very big favor by choosing something that would really make you happy. Life is too short to deprive yourself of happiness. Everyday, there are things that would deliver happiness. Even from the smallest thing that happens daily, there comes happiness. Sure thing.

All we have to do is to have our hearts open and just remain it open forever. What can we get from closing it anyway? It’s easy to be happy but it’s less easy to be real happy. Effort is actually needed.

We have to have our hearts opened.
We have to have our perspective set on His angle.
We just have to have HAPPINESS grow in us.

I WANT TO BE HAPPY.
I KNOW IT’S PRIMARILY FOUND IN HIM.
I ALWAYS WELCOME HAPPINESS IN ME.

God Does Plurk

2008-10-28T23:24:00.000-07:00

God really has his own ways of plurking, even hotter and crazier than how the cyber plurkers do the stuff. Oh well, He just plurked through an eye clash between me and my "Siztah" this afternoon that I can say is the highlight of this day.

I really thought that this day would just be an ordinary baranggay day after ditching the swimming escapade with my beloved Believer friends in celebration of our October Babies' birthdays. These October Babies are nonetheless Kevin[10/18], Jo [10,20], Mac [10/26] and Joycie [10,27] and not to forget! Rozee[10/02], Danesa[10/10] and Cha-Cha[10/24] are October Babies too, but I just don't know if the three also jived in the treat plan for the group.

Anyways, I just hope that ditching didn't really make a big fuss or anything alike. :) I just couldn't trade my obligations for a day of sun, pool, food and drinks and of course, I am still in the hyber-nation where I am so free to welcome my neighbors inside my system. My neighbors, lots of thoughts and realizations, that I never knew were just hanging around near me.

Well, afternoon came and came next the biggest surprise! Irene, my Siz Ai, came over that really rocked me! I was really dying to see and talk with her since I sense that there are a lot of matters to be settled regarding our teeeich lives and other important things that now are on the rock. We walked and walked until we almost reached the boundary of my baranggay while discussing crazy things that made us crazier and discussing serious matters that didn't seem to add just a little seriousness to us. I really missed her! And I really love her. She's one of the persons I truly trust and feel so comfortable with.

We just parted ways when Gizelle, her sister that I also dearly love, already came over as I togther with my SK fam started painting the town pink.

Thanks for the wonderful plurk SuperFriend. If I were to read that on the plurk island, I could have read.. "PAPA JESUS says: ANAK, enjoy ka muna.:)"

Antagonist

2008-10-27T11:40:00.000-07:00

Huwag sanang ako ang KONTRA-BIDA.
Oh well, pasasaan pa nga ba't ganon din ang labas.
SEE?
Being honest sometimes break through the peace and love walls.
I hate this hate feeling I am suffering from right now.
Ayoko na ng hatred. Tama ng natuto na ako.
But yung tingin na 'yun?
Yun ang hinding hindi ko makakalimutan.
Ang tingin na sana hindi ko na lang nakita.
I could have stayed longer, mingled and who knows, settled for a good conversation. Well, that was a dominant option.
But with that reaction that I saw, GOODLUCK.
Nawalan na ako ng ganang umakyat sa taas ng puno.

I Miss Vanity

2008-10-26T08:24:00.000-07:00

For a time, I had forgotten what vanity means. Too glad that I found it once again this afternoon. Honestly, it was only this afternoon when I first saw beauty again through the mirror ever since the now-dead first semester started. I really felt so ugly during that phase. Thank God, it's over! :)

Sangguniang Kalokohan

2008-10-25T13:24:00.000-07:00

Itinalaga ng batas na kailangan magdaos ng Baranggay Assembly ang bawat barangay sa buong Pilipinas tuwing March at October.

Ano ba ang Baranggay Assembly?

Ang B.A. ay isang event kung saan ang Baranggay Council ay ay kailangang humarap sa taong bayan para magreport tungkol sa mga nagawa nila at kung anuano pang mga bagay na mahalaga sa baranggay. Pwedeng magtanong ang mga taong bayan sa Barangay Council at syempre pwedeng pwede rin silang manggisa. Patay tayo niyan.

Ano naman ngayon?
B.A. namin kanina. Hindi pa nagsisimula pinagpapawisan na ako. Bakit? Dahil sa kaba na magisa ng bonggang bongga. Nakita ko kasi sa venue si Mr. Sison. Siya lang naman ang pinakamatinik na kritiko ng pamamalakad sa baranggay na ultimo kaliit-liitan na detalye ay hindi niya magawang palampasin. Ewan ko ba. Ang dami namang tao kanina pero siya lang ang bukod tanging bengga ng bengga.

Ang Kalokohan
Kasagsagan ng B.A. at medyo mainit na talaga ang sagutan sa pagitan ni Mr. Sison at ng council namin. Bilang SK Chairwoman ay hindi ako makakaligtas sa pambabatikos at pagtatanong niya. Goodluck. Nang nararamdaman ko na medyo mainit na ang tingin niya sa akin humiling ako kay Lord na gumawa ng himala. Haha.

Ang Himala
Nararamdaman ko na talaga na ako na ang kanyang gigisahin lalo na't lumiit ang IRA ng SK dahil namamatay na rin ang mga tao kaya nababawasan ang mga tax payers. Sa loob loob ko kasalanan ko bang may namamatay? Bongga! Haha. Biglang tumawag si Mommy sa fone. Sinagot ko.

Yang: Mommy? Po?
Mommy: Wag ka na umuwi. Okay na.
Yang: Huh?

Biglang sumingit si Konsehal Boy.

Konsehal: Yang, pinapasabi pala ng Mommy mo na umuwi ka muna agad!

Yang[hawak hawak pa ang fone at sabay pinindot, wala ng kausap]: Mommy? Okay uwi na po ako agad.
Konsehal: Sige! Bilisan mo. Sabihin mo pasensya na, nakalimutan ko. Ako na magsasabi kay Kap.

Saved by the Ring
Swabe! Swabeng pagtakas. Pero nakakaguilty! Hindi na ako bumalik e. Haha. Tapos na rin naman daw kasi. :)

Nostalgia: UST CA2

2008-10-24T23:23:00.000-07:00

I am browsing my folders on my USB. I felt a bit sad since I wasn't able to get copy of all the folders stocked on my old computer that I don't think can be revived anymore. Hemingways, I saw this notepad file and seeing this again really did make me smile and did crunch my heart.

Original Ca2 Family

Ggirls with Katie and Aunj

I miss my original ca2 family. I'm not being rude to my new section and besides I have no qualms over belonging to ca3 now. I just miss my very first Uste family, my Ggirls, the classroom setting and of course my seatmates, rowmates and the things we did and the the things I usually did while I was inside our very sphere. Hmm, and these include my doodles and other stuff I do with my pen and notebook while the professor's busy discussing something to the class. Hahaha.

-This one's inspired by Ms. Garcia, Natural Science Professor, while discussing the planet Venus.

Just like how the transits of Venus take place, I’ll gladly dance with you. We’ll leave a silhoutte of sweet moves that will send us both to a romantic nirvana everyone wishes to reach. Never give up the groove. Never. This will hold us closer and make us feel the warmth of the refrain’s tight embrace until we feel the urge of never letting go ’til the chorus’ end. Just look straight into my eyes and I will look into yours, too. Nothing beats the soulful conversation done not through the mouth but through the eyes that absolutely says it all. Yes, it is discreet but it is greatly felt. Only the heart can truly comprehend the meaning of that exchange, useless are the ears in that mode of communication.

From Glenda, my seatmate who I really miss to death.

Dance your heart and soul away. Don’t be frail or else I’ll get frail, too. Let your senses feel the freedom of moving, of being in their most awaken reality existing in dreams. Let them, your senses, and the whole you love ironies. May you accept a peaceful co-existence with contradictions that may leave you wondering for a while but enjoying for the rest of eternity. It is your choice if you really want to be trapped into a world of questions. What’s good in living with contradictions that sends you to wondering is that you are tickled to take the challenge. A challenge that asks you to discover the truth and not just stop in a phase full of asking. In the end, it makes you stronger and it makes you realize the value of taking risks; how you should risk and if there really is a need to.

Kismet

2008-10-23T23:34:00.000-07:00

I honestly don't know if I'm just putting meaning to everything that happened to me yesterday, October 22, 2008. But still, I do believe that Kismet does happen. 'Sigh!'

After a very long time, I'd seen him again. That moment was so unexpected and I actually prayed that for so long so I would know how would I feel if given a chance to set my eyes on him again. Well, from the moment my sight caught him to the moment it bounced back to where it was set upon prior to that glance, I felt something very unexplainable. I even said things that surprised my dad who I was with that morning. The things I said just came out from the bubble burst and I never risked looking at him again. But I am sure that it was him who I saw, no need for second glance or something. I was so shocked and pretty happy with what happened but I just don't know if he saw me too. I hope he didn't.

Oh well, many things happened yesterday and they all took me by surprise. But all these things crawl back into just one person and that's him. The person who will always have this special room in my heart. The person who always kicks a lot of romantic possibilities with other guys away from me. Is it really him kicking? Or it's just me and my wanting to kick them out just for him though I know it wouldn't help me and the world in any way?

Hmmm. :)

Aha-Aha

2008-10-18T12:28:00.000-07:00

It's sembreak! So Ariana/Yang/Yanggee or which name you wanna call her is back to the arms of reading that always rushes her to the stars.
Stephenie Meyer's books are her heroes at this point. Wuhoo! She loves TWILIGHT.
Too glad that she's now in no need of the powers of Vicks that used to save her nose and her breathing during the last days of this year's first semester. :D Sing her any of these songs and surely, it'll make her smile: Coldplay's Warning Sign, Shiver, The Scientist and Sparks; Dave Matthew's Band's Crash Into Me; and De Lara's Smile.

FOURTH

2008-10-17T07:39:00.000-07:00

SEMBREAK: IKA-APAT NA ARAW
Isa lang akong patabaing baboy sa bahay sa araw na 'yan. Naghihintay at pumapatay lang ng oras. Hindi katulad ng 3rd day ng sembreak ko. Naglinis ako ng mga poste sa barangay namin. Grabe! Narealize ko lang na ang sarap sakalin ng mga taon nagdidikit ng mga kung anu-anong job hiring sa poste nang walang pasintabi sa hall. Ang hirap kaya tanggalin. :c Pero! First time ko uling naligo sa ulan sa harap ng madlang tao. Haha. Umulan kasi nang mga bandang 5:30 pm! NO CHOICE pero GUSTO ko rin naman at naligo ako sa ulan kasama ng mga SK people at mga volunteers. Sobrang lakas ng ulan. Nakakaloko lang ang mga tingin ng mga tao na nakasakay sa mga sasakyan tapos nakatingin sa amin. Parang naglalaro lang kami. Pero syempre deadma at trabaho pa rin! Sobrang sinuklian naman yun ni Kap ng kanyang bonggang bonggang pakain. :)

TWILIGHT
Habang hinihintay lang ang oras. Grabe. :) Kinikilig ako ng soberrrr. Eto na naman ang sakit ko sa pagbabasa ng libro.. masyado ko dinidibdib- parang sa panonood lang din ng mga movies. Parang may part ng binabasa mo o napanood mong pelikula ang hindi na maaalis sa'yo. Parang nakatatak na siya sa'yo. May iniwan na siya sa'yo. Tapos, sa'yo naman.. parang may parte ng sarili mong tinangay na rin nung libro o kung anumang pelikula yun. Dala-dala ka na rin niya kung paano mo rin siya dinadala. ARTE ko lang. Mabuti nga pahinga muna ako sa DVD marathon di gaya nung summer! HAHAHAHA. Adik. :D Yan tuloy! Feeling Bella na akeer. Tsssss. :)

HIGHLIGHT: DEARIE

Date na ito.c: Ang lokaret lang talaga namin ni Sabrina. Last Monday we planned to go up pero hindi na rin kami natuloy sa Tagaytay. So we decided to have dinner sa Cafe Mar. Nauwi sa Frio. Na nauwi sa Pizza Blahblah sa Imus. Nauwi sa Monkey Bar na scary kaya iniwan din namin, haha. Then nauwi na sa Blue Wave.

Ewan ko ba. Last night parang go lang ng go. Masarap din pala ang ganon. Mga nasisirang plano tapos napapalitan ng mga impromptung pagdedesisyon. Try lang ng try basta hindi lumalagpas sa boundary. Ang daming realizations that night and I'm so happy. Kahit hindi kami masyadong nakapag-usap like ng usap na we had in our minds na gagawin sana namin.. ang dami ko pa ring narealize. :) I felt so comfortable last night na parang I was free to do anything and just be me. Drama ko na ba? Pero totoo. Chill lang kasi. Sana marami pang ganong moments to come. I feel so comfortable with Sab din kasi!c: I love her.

10 RANDOM ASO-ASO MOMENTS
[Bentang terminology ni Sab sa akin. :)]

Labas mo na I.D. mo! Uniform?

1. Pagkakita ko kay Sab sa 7eleven, Whoah! Uniform? Black and White! Hahaha!

2. Si kuya na kahit papano ay finreak out tayo sa tapat ng Imus Cathedral. Panira sa moment ko dahil first time ko talagang maka-upo sa plaza doon.XD Haha!

3. Palakad lakad sa Nueno nang walang katapusan. Ramdam ko na yung usok at alikabok Sab! HAHAH.

4. Tumawid sa super highway ng bara-bara lang kasi may matinong plano na! Wuhoo!

5. Memorable Pizza. SOBRA. Tsssssssssssss. XD Wrong Move! Haha!

6. Ang Black-Red-Blue girls na sumasayaw!! Wuhoo!! Buti pa si Ate Red, chill lang. Hahah. Si color Blue parang amazona talaga kung sumayaw. Nakakatawa!

7. Sila kuya ng bandang Rocksteddy na... Sab, tsktsk! Haha.

8. May kamukha si *TOOOT* na sobrang kaharap ko lang na sobrang pinatawa lang ako ng magdamag. Ngerr. Sab, hush uli! Hahah.

Sab: Si Carlo! ..Yang: Come! HAHA.:D

9. Makita si Be Bench Model Carlo na sinigaw ni Sab ang pangalan sa CR kasi may tama na ata* [:D] siya haha at tinimingan ang paglabas nila ni tatay ni Diyosa .

sab: tara balik!!!!

10. Maglakad from Blue Wave to Terminal and bumalik uli dahil blahblah pero habang naglalakad papunta sa terminal ay paulit ulit na sinasabi ng kailangang bumalik. HAHA. Labo!

Thanks Dear! HUGGS! :)

Sembreak Na. Yey! :D

2008-10-13T07:36:00.000-07:00

Nakakatuwa. Opposite ng umpisa ng araw ko ang nangyayari ngayong gabi.

Ang Kalaban sa Umaga
Gumising ako ng humihirit sa sarili na kailangan ko pa ng konting tulog. Pinagbigyan ko naman ang sarli kong hiling, syempre. 4:30 am yun. Kelangan kong gumising ng sobrang aga para tapusin na ang script para sa subject kong scriptwriting. good luck naman talaga sa akin, 8:00 am na uli ang resume ng aking paggising. Takbo agad ako sa computer. Type galore at kung anu-anong pag-iimbento ng linya para sa mga eksenang nakakaloka. Salamat. Natapos at na-email ko na din. Late nga lang. Haha. 40 minutes late din yun.

Huli Ka Balbon
Kahapon may Barangay Council meeting ako. Sabi dadalaw si Mayor Aguinaldo sa amin ngayon. Sabi ko hindi ako makasama sa pagsalubong sa kanya kasi finals ko. BIG BIG LIE. Haha. Naniwala naman si Kapitan. Pero ang kapit bahay namin na whatever na nagkataong konsehal sa barangay na nagkataong [ewww talaga para ikuwento] ay dumaan muna sa bahay bago pumunta ng hall kaninang umaga. Nakita pala niya ako. HULI KA BALBON MOMENT. Asar!

Phone Call Na Malupit
Tapos na akong maglunch. Masasabi kong sembreak na talaga kasi wala na akong ipapasa. Sobrang salamat kay Anna-bell na nagpass ng script namin sa USTe. Naisipan kong tumawag kay Irene. Naalala ko ang text niya kagabi na kung wala akong gagawin ay text ko siya. Ang simpleng kwentuhan ay nauwi sa pagtatanong niya sa akin kung ano ba ang gusto kong gawin ngayon sembreak. Sabi ko magpa-make over! Haha. Tee-eich lang o. At ang pangarap kong muling makapag ukay ukay! At dahil sa pagsagot kong iyan naaalala ko na ganito na ang takbo ng pag-uusap namin bago ko ibaba ang telepono.

Yang: O sige! Maliligo na ako! Wuhoo! Tapos, tawag uli ako sa'yo pag ready na.
Irene: O sige. Tawag ka ha! Bye!

Ayun. Nagkayayaan na pala kami. UBE na ito. :)

Meeting Place: LOTUS MALL
Na-miss ko ang Imus. Ang tagal ko nang hindi nagagawi dito. Pumasok kami sa MAKASAYSAYANG Lotus Mall. Nakakatawa! Inikot namin ang 2nd floor. Umaachive na ang Lotus, wala na ang mga cellphone chuvas. Umakyat kami. Pakielamara talaga ako.

Yang: Kuya! Bakit niyo nililigpit ang mga CD at DVD niyo?
Kuya: May raid e. [Chill lang ang kilos at pananalita]
Yang: Tapos na po?
Kuya: Hindi. Padating na daw.
Yang: TODOINKS.

Sobrang chill lang niya. Akala ko talaga tapos na yung raid. Panalo si Kuya! Nagtanong na si Ai kung saan kami magpapagupit.

Edwin Samot
Lumabas na kami sa mall. Pumunta kami sa E.S. sa labas kahit may E.S. naman sa loob ng mall. Si Siz ang naunang gupitan. Tinawag na ako. Hmm. Nakaupo na nga ako sa harap ng salamin e.. biglang.

Yang: Wait! Uhmm.
Gay-let: Yes?
Yang: Uhm, ganito.. hindi muna siguro ako magpapagupit.
Gay-let: Ah ganon ba Ma'am? Sige po.

Hinintay ko na lang si Siz. Nag-iba plano ko. O wala pa naman talaga akong matinong plano? Hmm. Tapos na siya gupitan. Pretty Siz!

Food Trip Ay Foot Trip
Nagyaya si Siz magfood trip. Sa PCI daw. NILAKAD lang namin mula Edwin Samot hanggang PCI. Malayo pala 'yun pero enjoy naman ako dahil todo hinga lang ako ng sama ng loob sa school kay Ai. Pero malayo nga talaga. Kung sa Ust parang nilakad mo mula Dapitan gate [labas ng school] papuntang P. Noval at didiretso papuntang Espana sabay tawid papuntang Mini Stop. Ang layo talaga lalo na ng nalaman naming wala dun yung food na gusto niyang kainin. Nauwi ang food trip namin sa limang pisong MAXX Candy.

Towards Towards-dan
Lumabas na kami ng PCI. Sa highway kami dumaan. Gusto na niya tuparin ang wish kong mag ukay-ukay. Pumunta daw kami sa PureGold. May lahi talaga kaming NOMADS. Syempre, naglakad uli kami mula PCI hanggang PureGold. Sa Ust parang mula AB buillding hanggang BEATO. Malapit na kami sa PureGold ng nadaanan namin ang Appliance Center ng isang kababata.

Yang: Wah! Si Ralph ba 'yun? Shocks!
Irene: OO! Siya 'yan!
Yang: Ay grabe! Ang laki niya ngayon! Bilis! Baka makita tayo.
Irene: Nakita na noh! Nakangiti pa nga.

Yun lang masasabi ko. Ang laki niya!

Nilamon Ako Ng Ukay-ukay
Ay grabe! Ang laki laki ng ukay-ukay na yun! Parang mas malaki pa sa buong ground floor ng AB tapos puno ng damit. SWEAR. As usual, nanlait lang kami ng mga damit. Dalawang oras ata kami sa loob at wala naman kaming binili. Hindi naman halata dahil hindi nagkakakitaan ang mga tao! Napagod talaga ako. Kinuha ng ukay-ukay ang energy ko. Pero wala pa rin kaming tigil sa kaka-comment sa mga damit. Hahaha.

UBE MOMENTS
Sobrang UBE moments lang talaga kami ng best friend ko. Share ko ibang details sa aking blog entry just for her and our adventure. Nakita pa pala namin ang BFF na sina Mark, Law at Axl. HAHAH. Umabot pa kasi ang aming adventure sa Imus Cathedral nang NAGLALAKAD lang uli. Buti nakasakay na kami ng jeep bago pa bumuhos ang ulan ng sobrang OA lang. Love na love ko si Ai!

My Name is RAIN
Ang OA lang talaga ng ulan. Pagbaba ko ng jeep, sumilong agad ako. Isa sa mga perks ng pagiging SK Chairman ang maalayan ng kantang.. "Hindi ka na mababasa ng ulan! Hindi na Hindi.. Hindi.. Hindi!" Hahaha.

Manong Tricycle [Oo, trike siya mismo. Chos!]: Chairman! Sakay ka na! Dali! Ang lakas ng ulan!
Yang: [Nag-iisip pa] Hmm.. Manong 'wag na po. Oaky lang.
Manong Tricycle: Hindi na darating boyfriend mo. Lakas ng ulan.

Marunong pa si Manong. Saan naman niya kaya napulot ang boyfriend ko. Buti pa siya kilala boyfriend ko, ako hindi. Haha. Naisip ko na ang saya panoorin ng ulan. Ayoko pang umwi. Masaya akong nakasilong sa maliit na bubong.

Teteng: Chairman!
Yang: Teng!
Teteng: Gusto mo ng payong?
Yang:Waaa. :) Pwede?
Teteng: Teka, sa'yo na ito.. hatid pa kita?
Yang: Huwag na! Balik ko na lang sa'yo ito bukas!

Ang saya. Ang saya labanan ang sobrang lakas na pagbuhos ng ulan. Ang sarap magsenti habang naglalakad mula kanto ng 7-eleven hanggang sa amin. Nang makita ko si Tita Mercy [Mommy ni Dhes] na walang payong mula sa Jolibee...

Yang: Tita! Wala kang payong?
Tita: Wala e!
Yang: Tara po! Hatid kita!

Kasabay ko siyang umuwi. Nakaktuwa. Namiss ko lang ng sobra sa Tita Apoy na isang taon na rinh nakatira sa US. Kamukha niya talaga! Kahit basang basa na ang kanang balikat ko, masaya din naman ang pag-uusap namin ni Tita Mercy.

YM na Malupit: DEARIE
BUZZ sabi ni Dearie Sab. Haha. Ang madramang usapan ay nauwi din sa yayayaan sa Tagaytay sa Thursday. Ang sarap sa pakiramdam na maki-reconnect. I lab it! Excited na rin ako sa Thursday hindi dahil makakadate ko si Sab, panahon na rin yung para makapag isip isip ako, kami.

YM na Malupit: CHOOCH SUMAGUI
Sobrang laughtrip lang talaga to. Dahil sa pag-uusap namin mas natuwa lang talaga ako kay MAGGIE at kay BJ! Hahaha, dahil sa hindi related na mga kadahilanan. Any naku, naguiguilty rin ako kasi kinikilig ako at natatawa at natutuwa habang si Chooch ay naguguluhan na sa buhay niya. Sabay may photo sharing pa na WALA na. Kilig lang ako. Haha. I MISS GGIRLS.

Ang saya lang ng unang araw ng sembreak ko. Kahit mabibilad na naman ako sa araw bukas dahil magpipintura at maglilinis kami ng mga poste sa barangay.. chill lang. :)

Happy sembreak ebribadi!

Feeling Niya Sex Scandal

2008-10-12T16:03:00.000-07:00

Nakakahiyang! Nakakatuwa. Galing akong barangay. Gumawa ako ng resolution para sa mga naka-line up na activities. Lumabas ako para magpaprint. Inabot ko kay kuya ang aking USB.

Yang: Kuya, paki-print po yung Resolution-Raffle at Resoultion-Tshirt
Kuya: Okay. Oops. Namatay yung PC. Wait ah.

Matapos ang ilang minuto.

Kuya: Eto na. Bale 16pesos lahat miss.
Yang: [inabot ang pera] Eto po.

Ang PASABOG

Kuya: Kokopyahin ko sana yung Sex Scandal sa USB mo e.
Yang: [sasabog na sa hiya] Uhm, e...
Kuya: Hahhaha! [parang nang-aasar]
Yang: E, buksan niyo yun. Wala pong lalabas. Virus yun e. Kahit burahin niyo, babalik pa rin.
Kuya: [siya naman ang kinabahan] Talaga? Wah. May virus na kaya ako?
Yang: [tumatawa sa kaloob looban] Uhmm, wala. Wala 'yan kuya don't worry. [Sabay labas sa kanyang shop]

WAHAHAHA. Akala ni kuya nasa kanya ang huling halakhak! ASA siya! Pero asar, may chuva content ang USB ko na wala naman akong kasalanan. Hindi naman sex scandal talaga yun e. VIRUS. Hmm. Ayoko naman pangunahan siya na sabihing "KUYA! HINDI YAN SCANDAL A! EWAN KO BA ANO PROB NYAN!" Kasi baka sabihin ang defensive ko. Hmm.

I'll Keep On Believing

2008-10-09T23:36:00.000-07:00

You may actually blame me for that drama. Honestly, it really was a walk out but I did it in the most polite way I could and so I did say goodbye and did kiss them on the cheeks only leaving them with the question, "Kararating lang a. Why leaving?" Well, it was not a stab.

So why the hell did I do that? Oh well, first -I guess- is because of tantrums. I'm always a victim. Bipolar attack? But I know the reason behind that act that night was far beyond the premise of psychological explanations. I know there's something deeper compared to that. I know there'e something and this something is right within me. My perspective. My own feelings. My own emotions.

Maybe I'm just tired. I'm tired of having this picture in my mind that I do belong to a one big happy perfect friendship family. I'm tired because it isn't the way reality holds the stiuation. In just a snap, I encounterd a sad reality check pushing me away towards home and leave them untimingly.

I don't know.

Maybe I'm just making a big deal out of nothing. Maybe this is another mistake of turning left and right in a straight road to life, peace and happiness. Maybe I'm just making the simple so complicated. Maybe I'm just addicted to complexities and so I think, see and feel this way.

I honestly don't care about what would happen next. I'm just tired of believing. Besides, who would do if everyone else doesn't seem to do so? I guess, only the name binds us. It's so sad. Why won't let the essence do the binding? And sure thing, it'll make a strong bond out of us.

What do they want me to feel? To be okay despite of the grease on their faces? Shame on me! I am the kind of a friend who stands up for the group, to this wonderful friendship no matter what; but this time regardless of how people would see me or think of me, I don't care. I just can no longer stay. I may still be a friend but to believe strongly to the group as a whole, I am not sure.

The heavens might kill me for this. This is a complete stupid, negative and paranoia-stricken metanoia. But my heart just coudn't comply to the norms. I hate what it dictates. And so I am breaking free. For a time, they're my norms but now I am gladly deviating. Call me a stupid deviant.

I guess it's time and I think this will help me to grow. Dettaching my anchor can be a good way to see life in a better way.

I'll surely miss them. It would be a very big lie to say that I wouldn't. I'm not sure if they'll feel the same way to me but to that I honestly don't care. If they do, I'll smile and move on.

These people have been good sources of strength for me. They have been wonderful. They have been good. They have been with me through almost everything. They have been within me.

But just like what other lessons in life would tell us, 'All good things must come to an end.' And so I think this would be the end of me as regards to them. But then again they say that 'Endings are beautiful beginnings.'

We actually don't know. This would be a stupid self-deprivation. They've been my happiness but now I no longer know the transparency and reality to that happiness. This, I can say, is a painful social abstinence.

I just could not stand the air that night. Things would never be the same again. Faded stars will never ever shine they way they did before. The damage has already been done to their show. And soon enough, their show will come to an end, it must come to an end anyway. The concept of forever is a big lie.

We were full of comfort back then. But now? Disatnce brought teh differences among us. People we face daily might have a big effect to this but still I couldn't understand why new faces win over the old ones who we've grown in us? We're fragile to circumstances and at times we let them rule over us.

I'm so dramatic. I'm so paranoid. I'm so stupid for feeling this way. You may get mad at me but I think I have to listen to myself too. I'm just being transparent to myself than to tell things that would possibly please you. It's time.

And if I hurt you, I, together with my honesty, asks apologies from you. I am so sorry for being honest. I'm sorry.

FUCK THE NORMS.

But if given a chance to start anew, I still want a phase with you.

--September 22, 2008.
01:02 am

Simula uli tayo. Yung malinis. Yung wala ng marka ng nakaraan. Mahal ko kayo. Kaya kahit gano kalamig ngayon sa atin, gusto ko kayong yakapin. Tara, ano ang laban ng lamig sa init ng ating yakapan? Magsilbi tayong init ng bawat isa.

Sabaw Pa Nga

2008-10-07T07:43:00.000-07:00

Maraming dahilan para maasar, magalit at mapikon ako sa maraming tao.
Mga taong malalapit sa puso ko, mga taong kilala ko, mga taong nakakasalubong ko at kung sinu-sino pa.
Pero kahit gaano kadaming dahilan ang pwedeng tumulak sa akin para maramdaman lahat ng posibleng negatibong reaksyon para sa kanila.. may isang matibay na dahilan kung bakit hindi ito nagtatagal.
Kung bakit kahit gano kasakit o kasalimuot o kaasar ang nagawa nila ay agad din naman 'tong naglalaho
at 'yan ay dahil sa pagmamahal.

Daig nito ang libu-libong alikabok sa lamesa kung saan nakasalansan lahat ng litrato ng kalungkutan at sakit na iyong pinagdaanan.

Dahil sa ihip at pagpag ng pagmamahal nawawala ang alikabok.

My peace be with you. XD

Bitterfly? Hinde A! :)

2008-09-29T06:54:00.000-07:00

Stop asking me about love. It’s not that I am bitter nor something. It’s just I don’t have an answer that would probably make you smile, giggle or some sort of like that. My life now is filled with excitement. Weh, excitement? Oh well, I am so busy with so many things and as much as possible I would want to make myself believe that they're all sooo exciting.

I would really want to think that doing the hamster maze and the paper for Psychology; the PSA for SocioComm; the Print, Radio and TV ad and the paper for Advertising; concept paper for Filipino; the activity and examination for Spanish; the 60 page script for Script writing; the project proposals for SK Federation; the development plan and project of the SK Council; the duties and responsibilities of an Ex Offcio member of the SB; the fund raising for the computer requested by the Day Care Center; the every Friday social interaction and preparation of activities for the youth; the weekly meetings for SKF, SKC and SB; the reports, ordinance and resolution to be submitted to the DILG are all EXCITING.

That was why I just laughed and laughed and suddenly stared blankly ahead when I was asked how my love life is. Almost everyone I bumped into that day asked me about that thing. It was actually weird. People I got to dance with during the karakol, people I got to worked with during the palaro for the kids, people I was with walking from the chapel to home, people who enjoyed the videoke like I did like it there was no tomorrow and people who never surrendered to bottles of beer have all asked me the same question. All of them got the same answer; I just laughed for a moment, smiled like I am the most beautiful young lady and said.. “Love life ko? Kelangan ba nun? Tatanong ka pa e!” And in return, most people gave me the same response, “Whooo! Kunwari pa to!” or “Whooo! Bitter?”

I don’t know. HAHAHA. I just want this dreadful semester to end. I want to rest!! I want sembreak to start!! I feel so stressful and sooo ugly.

Yang: Sobrang nakakastress no?

Det: Kasi wala kang lovelife. :D

Yang: Nyerrr.

Det: E kasi naman, kahit gano kadaming gawain masaya pa rin.

Yang: E kasi may towtow ka.

Det: J

Yang: XD HAHAH. [pero deep inside.. sabaw]

Tara Sa Playground

2008-09-12T22:45:00.000-07:00

Sa totoo lang hindi ko napapansin ang sarili kong pagtanda. Napapansin/nararamdaman ko lang na tumatanda na ako dahil sa mga tao sa paligid ko. Yung tipo bang ang ilang mga bata na pinagtatawanan namin nun sa school ay graduating na pala ngayon sa higshchool.
Doon.
Dun ko nararamdaman na, "Grabee! Graduating na sila? Ang tanda ko na!"
Ang pagpansin sa unti-unti kong pagtanda ay relative sa pagtanda nila.

Pero kahit ganon, hindi pa rin ako nagtatanda.
May dagdag nga sa edad, pero parang wala sa 'pagtanda.'
Hindi pa rin ako natuto.

Hindi ko pa rin maintindihan kung bakit isang araw ay parang hindi na lang kami magkakilala.
Bakit hindi ko na lang hayaan na ganon talaga...
Hanggang doon na lang talaga.

Bakit kailangang ipagpilitan kung alam kong hindi rin naman tama:
walang patutunguhan, walang kwenta at walang pag-asa.

Mauuwi lang sa pinagsawaang nguyain na bebel gum ang lahat,
mawawalan ng lasa, madedeporma, malalawayan at pagsasawaan.

At pagbisita ko sa playground, ayoko na sumakay sa see-saw o duyan.
Ayoko ng bumalik matapos umusad.

Mabuti pa sa padulasan na lang dahil kahit sa baba o lupa pa ang landing-an..

at least, may pinandigang patutunguhan.

Tara Santelices

2008-09-02T00:55:00.000-07:00

I don't really know her personally but God knows how concerned I am for her. My emotions got really stirred up the moment I read what had happened to her. You know sometimes people need no normative connection just to feel bad, good or whatsoever for someone. I just felt bad and still feeling so bad for such a crime to happen.

http://jaaac.multiply.com/journal/item/88/
-the good news

Keep the faith and hang on Ms. Tara!
There are a lot of people who you don't know and vis-a-vis who are praying for you and waiting for better news about your recovery. And wouldn't you want to see your multiply site stormed with messages and comments asking you to hang on, telling you that they're all and praying for you? And to even find out that these messages were posted by people who you barely know?:)

Miracles do happen.
We just have to BELIEVE.

Jelly Ako Sa 70's-80's People

2008-08-28T04:29:00.000-07:00

Hindi sa mga pinanganak pero naka-experience talaga ng totoong 1870's-1980's. Pakiramdam ko yan ang mga circas ng totoong pakikipaglaban para bayan. XD Sarap nun.
Ang dami na ring nagbago. Yehes, parang na-experience ko lang a.
Sabagay, ang dami namang libro, accounts at kung anu-ano pa ang magbibigay sa'yo ng ideas kung paano ang 70's at 80's e.

Lalo na ang 80's na may active participation ng mga mamamayan sa usaping bayan. Hindi ako sure pero yan yung pinapadama sa akin ng mga footages or whatever tungkol sa 80's. At etong participation na ito ay dictated ng concern para sa Pilipinas at hindi ng kung anumang suhol, bayad o upa o meryenda na makukuha mo ngayon kapag sumama ka sa mga rallies.

At syempre, bakit hindi ako maiinggit? 1983 nang pinatay si Ninoy Aquino, para sa akin ang swerte ng mga taong nasilayan pa siya bago siya ilibing.Oo, maka-Ninoy ako.:D PROUD. Kung andun siguro ako sa libing niya, iiyak ako ng todo. Uy, OA. Haha! At! Dito pa sinilang ang kauna-unahang PEOPLE POWER. Hindi sequel, yung original.c:

Yang: Waa.XD Pano kaya kung tatay ko si Ninoy no?:)

Glenda: Kung tatay ko yun.. Hmm, ipagpapatuloy ko ang nasimulan niya..

Yang: Hmm.:) Kahit di ka anak nun, pwede mong ipagpatuloy!

Glenda: Si! Si!:)

Nang mapag-usupan ni Yang, Glenda, Anna at Mela si Sir Ninoy.c:

**PICS FROM TRIBUTE TO NINOY SITE.

A Very Special Love

2008-08-25T04:22:00.000-07:00

Marami akong dapat gawin. Pero naisip ko na kung lulunurin ko ang sarili ko sa trabaho at pagugupit ng banderitas e mas lalo lang akong mahihirapan.

Sa madaling sabi.. nagpapalusot lang ako.:) HAHA. Ang gsuto ko lang naman talaga ay gumala at mag-unwind.

Sakto naman at nang nagtext ako kay Pao, go yaya na siya sa SM para manood ng A Very Special Love. Super impromptu ang lahat kaya hindi na nakasama pa yung iba. SORRY. At may hinahabol din kasing time at nakisabit lang talaga kami kina Gee, Jeyd at Leo.

Asarrr.:) Wrong move ata ang pagtabi ko kay Leo. Bwisit! Kilig na kilig siya. ARR. Naalala ko tuloy nung summer, nasa HQ kami at napag-usapan si Sarah...

Yang: Nyerr... Si Sarah? Di ko naman siya masyado gusto.. Wala lang..

Leo: Ay naku, crush na crush ko yon e. Kaya kahit sabihin mong sabay magcoconcert si Mariah Carey at Sarah sa Pilipinas e iindianin ko si Mariah. Sarah ako.

Wahaha. Sumakit talaga tiyan ko nun. Ganon niya ka-gusto si Sarah kaya kilig na kilig siya sa pelikula.

Grabeee. In fairness, ang ganda nga ng atake ng pagkakagawa. Ang simple lang pero nadaan sa mga close up shots ni John Lloyd. Chika. Hay! At posible pa rin pala akong kiligin ng ganon. Haha.

P.S.
Alam ko na kung bakit ang daming kinilig sa 'A Very Special Love.' E dang hoot lang pala talaga ni Loydie e. Oo, close kami. Loydie tawag ko sa kanya at HONEY tawag niya sa akin. Nyeer.

May videoke eksena dun na nakakatunaw lang talaga ang tingin niya. Ngrr, yung tingin na pailalim. Ay sus. Natulala na lang ako.

AT... ang galing lang niya magdala ng damit.c:

*KILIG*

AT! Bloopers talaga nagdala sa pelikula. HAHA.
CHOS.

For Rent

2008-08-22T18:09:00.000-07:00

I can still remember. It was a 2CA2 Theo day with sir Pabs when Dakki cracked a joke that actually hit me. Sir Pabs was telling the whole class then that if a person is lost.. if a person doesn't know where he's heading to.. then most probably he's not yet home. Then after some explanations and some sort of a story telling in line with the topic, he asked this question which Dakki answered.

Sir Pabs: E class, if the person is not yet home.. if the person does not know where he's going to, ano tawag sa kanya?

Dakki: E di sir, *nangungupahan.*

Ofcourse, everybody laughed. We laughed. I laughed. But that liner just didn't make me laugh.. it made me dig in to a sensible realization actually.

And now, I am in the same phase again. I mean what I realized that day last year is very much alike of what I feel these days..

if that's the case--

Well, ako po ay isang nangungupahan.

I don't know where I am heading to. It's like everything is so vague. I know there's something wrong.. there's something missing.. there's something what-the-hell-is-happening stuff.. and I am actually tired YET getting used to these things. I just let the current carry me either back to the shore or to the middle of the sea.
GOODLUCK.. moreover, GODBLESS.

I don't know where to go..
But there are two things I am very sure of..

1. I have HIM.. I have my ONE WAY. :)

2. I can not and should not crawl back into his open arms. [ regardless of the word 'open.']

I just hope to save and have more *money so that one day, I would no longer worry about my rental fee.. I could have a *house of my own. So that I would no longer be *nangungupahan.

p.s.
-Thanks Dakki for such a wonderful liner. :)
Pabs too for paving way..
Oh well, it's been monthsssss.... XD

-WARNING SIGN will tell MY truth.
lablablab coldplay.

Baklash Aker

2008-08-20T07:27:00.000-07:00

Ya, para akong isang gay.. closet gay to be specific.

Ang closet gay pag nagladlad na.. naku! expect the unexpected. pag nakalabas na sila sa mapagkunwaring mundo nila at umapak na sila sa mundo ng katotohanan nang hindi iniisip ang mga mapgmatang isip at mapag-isip na mata.. grabe na ang kilos nila. di naman lahat, pero may mga pagkakataong ganun. kung dati ay tinatago nila nga katauhan nila sa maton na pananamit.. aun, pag nag-out na sila.. transvestite na labas nila o basta may bahid na ng pagkababae.

parang ako.. nung nailabas ko na sa mundo ang tunay niyang* lagay sa puso ko.. nakakatawa man pero grabe pala. hehe, para akong nabunutan ng tinik. ngrr.. dati kasi noong pinagninilay nilayan ko pa kung ano ba talaga siya sa akin ay dalawa lang ang naisip kong pwede kong bagsakan.. una, di ko talaga siya gusto. panaglawa.. gusto ko siya. at alinman sa dalawang iyon ang matuntunan ko eh paniguradong laya na ako.. sa lagay nga lang ngayon eh ang nabagsakan ko ay a - gusto ko talaga siya.

kaso.. para atang inoostracize ako ni kupido. kung kelan naamin ko na sa sarili ko.. at sa mga kaibigan ko na hanggang ngayon ay nawiwindang pa rin ata eh nawala naman siya. hmm..

nawala ba siya? o wala naman talaga siya?

PS
lab ko mga gays.. I have nothing against them.:)
nagamit lang yung thought sa entry na ito, pasensya.

May nagtext sa akin, nabasa daw niya tong entry ko sa isang site.. haha. laugh trip daw kasi kung ikukumpara yung feelings ko ngayon, parang walang ganyang eksenang nag-exist.c:
HAHA. I must agree!
LAUGHTRIP pala talaga at muntik ko nang di mahanap ito.

july 13 2007.

Believers: Baha sa Espana!

2008-08-16T07:28:00.000-07:00

ONE FOR ALL.. ALL FOR ONE.

August 15, 2008
Bedan, Iska, Normal, Mapuan, San Juan.. lahat nagbuhay Thomasian!
"Lulusong na kami sa baha.. kumusta namang adventure na ito!" text ni Alex na isang taga-UPLB. Hindi na ako sigurado sa mismong text niya pero ganyan ang nilalaman. Natawa na lang ako. Dumiretso pa siya mula UPLB papuntang USTe para magkasama kaming muli.c: Tiningnan ko lahat ng kasama ko nang gabing iyon, kahit binaha na at inulan at kung anu-ano pa.. andun pa rin kami-MASAYA.

ANG KWENTO
around 5:30pm
Unang dumating sa USTe si Jeyd at Gee. Bago ko sila puntahan nakasalubong ko pa si Armin-gay [ang tawag ko kay Mr. Purificacion na kung tawagin ng gigals ay Armin the English Boy, haha], sinabi ko sa kanya na pupunta sa USTe ang ilang blvrs kaso! Deadbat na ako nun kung kaya hindi ko nakuha ang number niya. Kasi naman papalit palit ata siya ng numero. Pero ang nakakatawa dun ay binigay ko sa kanya ang numero ko at sinabing itext niya ako para malaan ko ang contact number niya para matext siya mamaya. Go, tawa.. pano ko nga naman marereceive, dead bat na ako. Yang talaga o. Pero kaintindi intindi kasi ng araw na iyon, LUTANG talaga ako. Maging ang advertising exam namin ay di ko pinalagpas, lumutang din. Pero bilang mananalig ng The Secret.. pasado ako niyan.c: Wuhoo. Fighting spirit lang yan! [haha]
Nakita ko sila Jeyd at Gee sa tapat ng main building. Tinanong ni Jeyd kung madalas bang may nagaaerobics sa Plaza Mayor, natatawa kasi siya. Pero mas natawa na lang ako kasi para sa akin, normal na lang yun.

around 6:00 pm
Tumambay na kaming tatlo sa pav ng Beato. Biglang dumaan si Chooch na lab ko. Galing siya sa Edtech kung san din ako nanggaling ng hapong iyon. Hinatid ko siya sa gate dahil pauwi na siya. Habang naglalakad kami, ang layo ng tingin ko. Tawa lang kami ng tawa dahil sa pinag-uusapan naming hindi ko na maalala nang biglang may natanaw akong pamilyar ang mukha! Akalain mong si April na pala iyon. Woot, nakauniform na siya! Tumalon ang puso ko. Ang tagal na naming hindi nagkikita. Masarap din pala sa pakiramdam yung ang tagal niyo ng hindi nagkikita tapos sa isang iglap, pag nagkita na kayong muli ang sarap sarap sa pakiramdam, ang saya.

around 7pm
Dumating na din sila Joyce at Ceejei sa pav. Kinain na namin ang cake na dinala ko na una ng minurder ng aking mga blockmates. Okay lang.c: Muka naman silang gutom kaya hindi na napansin ang tila na-rape na cake[haha]. Ang sarap. Hindi masyadong matamis. At ayan na nga.. umulan na, lumakas pa. Kausap ko si Jeyd tungkol sa sining. Natutuwa ako.c: Grabe, nagmature si Jeyd artistically. Coolness! Sana macapture niya lahat ng saloobin niya through still images.
Tapos, nagtext na sila Pao. Andun na daw sila ni Patty sa Ministop Spain, napangiti ako. Mas naexcite kasi ako at parami na kami ng parami. Medyo tumila na ang ulan, nagpasama ako kay Jeyd na tingnan sila Pao sa gate. Wala kaming nakitang Pao at Patty dun, Chris ang nakita namin. Pasakay na siya ng jeep. Hinatak ko pabalik ng USTe. Dumating na din sila Pao at Patty umalis na rin kami ng pav.

around 8:00 pm to 9:00pm
Dumiretso kami sa 1611. Wala ng space. Grabee.. pumatak na ang ulan. Ang lakas, sobra at hindi pa humihinto. Ayun, stranded kami sa bubong ng 16. Dumating na rin sila Leo at Elaine! Wuhhooo! Umuulan pa din, umaangge pa nga. Para talagang sinadya. Naku, nagtext si Mac. Sa Dapitan pa ata siya napadpad e nasa P.Noval kami. Ang masaklap dito, wala siyang payong. Humirit si Chris, sabi niya "Just give me ten minutes at babaha na." Humirit din ako, sabi ko two minutes lang. Hindi kami nagkamali, baha na talaga.
Umalis na kami ng 16 at napagdesisyunang magdinner na lang. Shakey's dapat kaso ichechek muna ang baha sa main road ng Spain. So go lakad kami. Dinaanan na namin si Mac sa Mini Stop P.Noval. Grabe, para ng tabo ang mga sapatos ko, may salok salok na talagang tubig. Naaawa ako sa sapatos ko kaya't sumubok akong bumili sa Jolie's ng tsinelas. Natatawa pa si Chris na kasukob ko sa payong dahil wala naman daw tsinelas dun. Pero naisip ko na baka meron dahil sa hirap ng buhay ngayon ang mga negosyante ay nag-iisip para lalo pang kumita. Alam naman siguro ng may-ari ng Jolie's na bahain talaga sa Uste kaya dapat may tinda silang tsinelas. Hindi ako nagkamali, mayroon silang tsinelas! Tagumpay!

around 9:30pm
Wala na kaming magagawa. Abot tuhod o lagpas tuhod na ang baha sa Spain. Hindi na talaga kami makakaghapunan sa Shakey's. Nakakatawa, nakasalubong ko pa si AK na galing na sa isang session sa Ingrita[ba yun?]. At kawawang grupo dun din kami bumagsak. Ay sus! Ang isang napakagandang planong pagsasamasama ay nauwi sa nakakalokong hapunan sa kainang iyon. Ay sus! May kasama lang naman kaming mga manong na nagvivideoke ng parang wala ng bukas. Opo, para kaming nasa chaotic society ng mga panahong iyon. At nang nagpahinga konti ang kumakanta hindi namin mapigilan na maisip na, "Pare! Congrats, we now reached the state of Nirvana.."
Nagtext na rin sila Alex at Jo at malapit na rin daw sila. Dapitan jeep din ang nasakyan nila, goodluck! Kung saan saan pa sila nagpasikot sikot at napadpad para lang makapunta sa Ingrita[nga ba uli yun?]. At wag kalilimutan.. lumusang din sila sa baha.

around 10:30pm
Magkakasama na kaming lahat.c:
Wala na, kwentuhan galore na lang talaga ng uber. Ang saya! Nakakatawa si Elaine, humihirit ng inuman. Kawawaa napurnada pa ng ulan ang gusto niya. Si Jo naman ang haba ng buhok! Pinagtripan namin ni Ape. Grabe, para siyang nanay niya! Haha, mas maganda pa nga ata. Si Mac naman, gago at bangag pa rin. Joke, [haha]. Si Leo naman adik pa rin sa pagsasayaw! Kahit P.Noval hindi pinatawad, nagsasayaw siya. Si Chris naman, sinungaling. Haha. Alam na.c:

around 12:00am
Nagyayaaan ng umuwi. Oo, uuwi pa lang kami niyan. Kung gano kabilis bumaha ay ganun din kabilis humupa ang tubig. Si Elaine sobrang tinatawag na ng kalikasan. Yung iba nagcommute na lang, kaming mga babae sa auto. Katabi ko si Elaine, naaawa akong natatawa. Ihing ihi na siya at nagpipigil lang. Nakaramdam siya ng langit ng marating na namin ang Blue Wave. Congrats talaga sa kanya. Si Apegurl, tulog na tulog. Tsk, Public Health talaga o.
Diretsong hatid na rin sa kanya at kay Alex. Naku, sa uultin!

around 2:00am
Umuwi ako sa amin pero sandali lang. Kumuha lang ako ng choco malllows at caramel bar para sa kanila. Buti na lang chill lang si Daddy at pinayagan akong tumambay kina Pao. Grabe, tawa galore lang sa kanila. May photography lesson pa si Jo, idol.
Si Leo, lasing na. Nagsasayaw na naman at umiiyak pa. Si Ceejei at Pao, mga bading pa rin. Tsk, nakakaawa sila sabi ko sa kanila libre ang self liberation. Si Mac at Elaine, akalain mong nagjive.c: Ayun, umuwi na rin konti sina Jeyd at Gee.

around 5:30am
Iniwan ko na sila dun. Inaantok na ako. Hindi ko na carry. HAHA.
Sila super umaga na umuwi.

bottomline
MASAYA AKO.
Pero MAS SASAYA ako kung kumpleto kami.. at kung may mga gigals at iba pang ust friends na makakasama ko sa mga ganung pagkakataon.
Wala pa rin si siz at lowlah.. sana NEXT TIME andun na sila.

Miss Mo Ko No?

2007-12-08T06:16:00.001-08:00

That gesture's enough.

No need to tell me why the hell in this world you took time for that.

Thanks by the way.

Whether it was or was not an accident.. you made my day.=))

You made it perplexed yet sweet.

I hate to say and admit this..

I miss you.. a lot.

[03:05:04 pm. You touched me again.]

Miss Mo Ko No?

2007-12-08T06:16:00.000-08:00

That gesture's enough.

No need to tell me why the hell in this world you took time for that.

Thanks by the way.

Whether it was or was not an accident.. you made my day.=))

You made it perplexed yet sweet.

I hate to say and admit this..

I miss you.. a lot.

[03:05:04 pm. You touched me again.]

He told me..

2007-12-04T06:14:00.000-08:00

..that I should keep on praying.

I will.

I won't stop even if He answers my prayers already.

I know..

I know this is the best way for me to endure this phase without you.

And when we finally meet or meet again, let us pray together.

Let's pray for him who keeps on reminding me to pray for you.

IRITA

2007-12-01T06:13:00.000-08:00

argh.. una, seryoso akong sinabihan ng suplada.. then.. may 'kidnap' sumthing pa.. tapos ano toh? wah.. naiirita na ako.. huhuhu! super-Huh?? then ano yung huli niyang sinabi? What? Bakit ano ko ba siya? Oh no! But still, I have to keep my cool. Kaya ko 'to! Then may conditions pa para lang maayos na.. stupid! ano ba.. feeling niya! asar.. asar..

ayaw na ayaw ko sa lahat ay mga 'feeling'. wahhh! he should stop this! ayoko lang talagang may ka-iritahan sa fed kaya tiis muna.. duh!! pero asar naman. wahh.. feeling niya! feeling niya! feeling niya!!!!!!!!!!

Kwento Lang

2007-11-20T06:11:00.000-08:00

Hindi ako okay. Pero okay naman ako. [Huh?] Ewan. Hindi ko alam kung bakit?Pero alam ko. [Huh? uli.] Ay sus, nagsanga-sanga na nga. Pero hindi naman. [Ano?] Ay naku, p-r-a-n-i-n-g na naman! GoodluckT_T

SARI-SARING KWENTO NA WALA NAMAN KWENTA [BOTTOMLINE: NADEPRESS AKO DAHIL SA KANILA, HAHAHA..LOL.]

Those* text messages mean one thing! Nasa Myx Mo sila. Aw, what a way to spend a Tuesday night! Pero nasan ako? Hahaha=') Wala sa blue wave, di nila kasama. *sniff* huhu!

Kanina, nagtext si ate nagpapafoot spa daw siya at nagpapabago ng hair do. Na-excite ako kasi pwede nun akong mapasaya[mapaganda rin.. feel ko super pangit ko lalo.] Kaso nasa bus pa lang ako pauwi and what i did was to pray na sana pag nakarating na ako Cavite 'di pa siya tapos and besides malapit na ko nun that time. I texted her nung nakauwi na ko asking kung san siya.. she said, "Secret! hahahah" Argh! Mataas na emotions ko before pa nun tapos dadagdagan pa niya. haha! And so natulog ako kasi asar si ate.. then pagkagising ko, ang dami niya text. Pinapasunod na ko. Aw, wala na. Late na yun.

Super nakakadepress yung manong na katabi ko kanina sa bus. Oo, masama manlait or mampuna pero totoo naman kasi eh. Hay, kulang na lang masuka ako sa amoy niya. [im so sorry Dear God.=s] Grabe, nakakahilo. Hay, buti na lang may vacant seat pa na pwede kong lipatan. Kaso!! Nung lilipat na ako.. yung Ale na may dalang bata na dapat tatabihan ko ay may eksenang naganap na 'di kanais nais! Sumuka yung bata! Sinukahan pati yung upuan. Okay, di ako pwedeng lumipat!

Hindi ko nakasama sa lunch ang mga g-girls! Aaw, si Kapitan kasi ay may kailangan. Pero yun na 'yon eh. Kailangan nang masanay. Simula na ito. Aja! Pero hindi pala talaga ako naglunch. Yun pala yung mas masakit dun! Diretso uwi na ako. Haypf.

Sabi sakin ni Coun. Redd kahapon kailangan ko magfile ng expenditure something sa Comelec! Eh wala naman akong resibo, blah-blah. Asar pa lalo kasi -EWAN- haha. Ayoko ng mga ganun che-che bureche eh manghuhula lang naman ako. Duh? Magkano ba ginastos nung kampanya? Wala naman. [weh?]

Bukas, dapat magdidivi kami nila ate. Bili kami flowers for Mom's passion for decorating. Ang dami ko ng balak bilhin! Nagsave na nga ako for tom! WAAH! Pero.. ngayon nagday off ang ate kong magaling! wasak. May pasok siya tom and that means, next week na ang lakad.

Bwisit! Sinong tao ba ang nagpauso na dapat may boypren o gelpren ang isang taong nasa edad ko? O at least ay nagkarelasyon man lang? Duh? Buti yung iba 'di makitid ang isip! Wala daw akong boypren kasi ang panget ko daw, salamat naman sa teoryang yun! ahaha.=s Eh bakit ayaw ba nila maniwala na ayokong pumasok sa bagay na 'di ako sigurado at di ba nila matanggap na ayoko lang talaga? Mga nagmamadali!! Tsk, tsk, tsk!

Sus, ayoko nang magpaliwanag pa. Sabihin.. bitter ko na naman. Okay, say what you wanna say.=) Go.

Ayoko ng ulam namin ngayong gabi! Ayoko na ng manok.=c Huhuhu, goodluck na lang sa tinola at pinritong manok. Ayoko kumain!!!

Wah, nakakapikon na rin talaga ang cellphone ko! Ampf, asar! asar! Topak! Huhuhu. Simula nang nabasa yun, nagsimula na siyang maghasik ng kadiliman!

Wah, HIGIT SA LAHAT!! May naaalala ako sa mga ganitong panahon! Argh, yung tipo bang magdedecember na, magpapasko. Wuhoo! Goodluck naman talaga. Yun yung nakakapraning eh. huwat? Grabe. Tsk, nung nagkakabit nga ng Christmas tree eh ang emo ng atmosphere. KURNI. Pero yun eh. ASAR.

PolitiKalokohan

2007-11-12T06:10:00.000-08:00

Intelligence fund daw ni Vice Governor is 3million. I just don't know if it's yearly or quarterly binibigay. I hope every year na lang and I guess it is impossible if it's quarterly! Duh! Ano yun? 12million a year just for the intelligence fund? Hmm. Intelligence fund nga pala as I understood from what Councilor said sa meeting is the money na binibigay sa isang elected officer and this money can be spent for anything without an audit or supporting files like receipt. Ya, sa officer na yung money and kahit saan pwede niya yung gastusin. Hay, he added na yung intelligence span ni Vice ay napupunta sa mga Board Members niya kasi pinag-oout of town sila. Eh sana sinama na lang yun sa pondo ng bayan nang sa gayon eh nakadagdag pa sa panggastos para sa development. Sa pagpapakain!

Based from that.. naisip ko lang na pano pa kaya si GMA?? AMPF. Magkano kaya Intelligence fund niya?? BILYON!!? At yun pa ang sasabihin nilang WALANG PERA ANG PILIPINAS?? ano to?? LOKOHAN!!?

Others might think that SK is useless.. pampagulo lang. But I beg to DISAGREE. Pag inuuod na ang mga katawan nila sa ilalim ng lupa.. sino ang papalit?? Ang henerasyon na sumunod sa kanila diba? Sa ganitong satge pa lang dapat MALINIS na. Baluktutin ika nga nila habang maaga.

JOHANN: Yang! Ano ang masasabi mo sa Pilipinas??

YANG: Uhmm.. like ano?

JOHANN: One word lang ha! Kahit ano!!

YANG: PINAPAASA.;c

Mcdowww

2007-11-10T06:09:00.000-08:00

Sabbie and I just couldn't help it. Originally, we're five when we went there: Alex, Sabbie, Aekei, Joan and me. Two went home early and I was left with Alex and Sabbie. Good talk.=) As in! I felt like, "Finally! Mcdo is again a comfort zone to me and my friends." Hmm.. we miss that and how we'd spend time with MCDO and his friends[the crew, haha] 'til closing time. We three shared thoughts on marriage[inspired by ate Anna and Kuya Biboy], the kind of guys who we think is for us and other girly stuff other boys would really want to hear. Haha.xp Yes, tips for the boys! Then, Johann came and of course that made Alex's heart beat faster!:D And so we talked, blah-blah.. then time came when Alex should be home already. It's understood that Johann should be home, too! Talk about.. yea-know, hehe! I thought that would be the end of the day. But! Sabbie and I didn't go home yet! Hahaha.. Yes, we two were left and gosh!! Super talk!!=') Tsk, like what I've said earlier: we just couldn't help it. Many problems are now bugging us and if we don't let it out.. it would poison us. Wah, thanks for those moments..=') Hmm, it's been a while since last did that! A lot of realizations rose from our conversation. She really is a GOOD friend. Aaww.=') And I am so happy to have her in my life.

I. Sab: Pihikan ka kasi 'eh.

Yang: You think so?

Sab: Mapili, hehe.

Yang: Ewan. Kasi alam ko there's this one God has prepared for me.

Sab: Wah, ako rin! Yung tipo bang perfect for you.

Yang: Yon!=) Kaya kahit matagal akong magwait for that person ay okay lang.. kasi i want to be sure na pag nagmeet na kami we can face everything, di kami agad susuko.

II. Sab: Sana maging okay na si *. Sana marealize niya na kahit papano what he's dong is wrong.

Yang: Hay, ang lalim kasi nung pinagkukunan niya ng galit eh.

Sab: Ya, kaya siya sigurong maraming girls na chinuchuva. I guess dahil 'di niya kasi ganun nafeefeel love ng alam mo na.

Yang: Oo nga noh. May reasons pala talaga noh on why you'd act like this or that. Minsan nattrace talaga siya sa family or sa history or sa kung anuman ang nangyari.

Sab: Diba? Hmm, siguro nga gnun.

III. Sab: May isa pa akong problem.

Yang: Wah, I think alam ko na yan and I think nangyayari rin siya sa akin.

Sab: Wah, yun na nga! About sa Kanya.

Yang: Sab!! Korek.='c shocks! iba na talaga.. I can feel na tinitest Niya talaga tayo.

Sab: Oo, iba na kasi. I want the feeling.. yung spiritual hunger back!

Yang: Grabe, Sab! me too.. To tell you honestly, itong recent na worship revival ay di ganoon yung impact.. get it?

Sab: Oh no!! For me too..:c Pero wag na wag tayong bibitaw! We'd help each other.

Yang: Swear, ayoko namang mapalayo sa Kanya or something! Kaya natin toh.. Basta, we'll strongly hold onto Him.

IV. Yang: Sana 'wag tayo mabuwag noh?

Sab: AY! hindi pwede!!

Yang: Naku, iiyak talaga ako.;C masakit yun.

Sab: Syempre naman! Ilang years of friendship.. Believers.. matibay tayo!

Yang: Mahal na mahal ko kayo eh.. sana wag humantong sa point na hiwa-hiwalay.. Wala ng unity or reason para magsama sama uli.

Sab: Wag! Kakatakot yun.. And sana kung anuman ang nangyayari now e masolve.

Yang: Of course! and paglalaban natin to ofcourse.. and dito wala na akong pride-pride na iintindihin.

V. Sab: Pag may lovelife yung mga bestfriends natin.. wala tayon lovelife. Haha.. pansin mo?

Yang: Shocks! Oh my.. last year, masaya Christmas ko.. and Siz Ai's was so-so lang.. Hmm.. pero now.. for SURE.. masaya Christmas niya and goodluck na lang sa Pasko ko this year! Hahaha..

Sab: Diba? hahaha. Kamusta naman yun!

Yang: Pero ilang weeks pa.. sana mag-dilang anghel si Aekei.. haha..=)

Sab: Sus.. pero im happy. And we should be all happy! Andiyan naman kayong mga friends ko 'eh.:)

Yang: Korek! Aaaw.
Tags: emo, lord, love, believers, teeeich, friendship, prayers

Praningerzy

2007-10-25T06:08:00.000-07:00

PRANING, the best word to define me these days. I admit that but I am not proud. Wah. Put the blame on how kismet's spoon stir my life's potion this sembreak. It's like everything has really changed and no matter how hard I try not to be affected, still my heart can't banner its strong facade thus making it frail and susceptible to pain, agonies and worries.

PRANING CASE I:

Others might think that mauve is the new color of my future or even my dreams. But I want to scream right infront of their faces that NEVER. I won't ever let myself fall prey to something I know I can fight and eventually defeat! These people should always bear in mind that I am no giver-upper! Mauve? The hell with them! Mauve their faces! When I say purple is the color of my future and dreams, it will always be. It will never be pale or be put into lesser degree or hue. It is always as it is. Besides, I am the captain of my ship and who are them to say where will I head next if they don't even have a single finger or touch on my ship's control!

**Yang! Is there anyone who makes you feel like this? Ok, let's say there is but are you sure that this is what they think about? Argh! Paranoia-stricken baby better behave.

PRANING CASE II:

Have you ever thought of me since the day the Heavens separated us from each other? Have you ever missed me and even cried because of that strong and deep wanting to have me back? Have you ever asked the stars why did they move in such positions that's why we're here now.. two worlds apart? have you ever felt the feeling of being left in stillness with nothing but the memories we had? Have you ever asked yourself why the hell we talked about almost everything but never about our feelings?

you-[n] someone.

**You? Have you ever asked yourself why? Yang, stop asking questions that are too demanding for the answers. You know that the answers are with that *you so now why won't you ask that *you to solve this puzzle? You know how to solve this so stop making your questions eat up your mood and make you fly back to that phase wherein you thought everything has no end.

PRANING CASE III:

It is a crime. I know. It is a crime to fall for someone you knew from the start you shouldn't fall for. Most specially, if that someone already has someone and those someones are your friends! Woah! One of the worst case scenarios.But it's more of a crime if that someone is semi-catching you and you're not doing anything to stay away.

**no comment. PRANING ka lamang talaga!
ASSUMING.

MAHAL KO SI MONG

2007-10-06T06:05:00.000-07:00

oct.06'07. mong is a killer.=) PAOLO, SABBIE, and RIZZA!! Three great creations whose souls are truly marveled at by none other than ME! Uber [to the nth power.;p] thanks to the Creator for having given these immortals the splendid chance to live here on earth and having decided to have their paths crossed mine as mortals! Ohyea! Why??

For these freakin' freaks paved way for that freakin' moments of freakin' reunion of hearts [harharhar.:D] of a freakin' 'Mong-oloid' [that's super-me.:)] and the freakiest freakin' MusicMan[mongkee; mong alcaraz!!! HEARTHEART!HEART!].. that always makes that freakin' 'Mong-oloid' freak out. Yah, they've paved way for that freakin' semi-eternity-inspired event dubbed as

"YangniMong.at.MongniYang; Ang Muling Pagkikita Hindi Lang Mata sa Mata.. PUSO sa PUSO pa!"

Oh man! FREAKIN' AWESOME! haha.. and when I say it is FREAKIN' darn awesome, nothing gets freakier than that ever.

i wanna die moment. c;

Come on! Sometimes, overstresing or exaggerating really helps to tone one's self down and that's exactly what I am doing rightnow.. hihi.. 'cause I am overly charged with romantically incriminated particles that makes me feel so high rightnow!:) sorry.

Next week is supposed to be a 'hell week' to me since it is our final examination week but I don't think it would be darn as hell now. Everyhting has changed. Inspired, oh man that's me. No one has ever stirred love potion in me this great and addictive[scary huh?;p]. HAHA. I care no longer if I intentionally hadn't spent the Saturday of my weekend to study for HST and Mathematics of Finance for I would surely be sent to path to damnation if I lost the chance to see and watch Mong! Ngrr.:))

Gosh! When I saw him again.. I was like 'waaah!!! Mong!!!:)))))))))))))))))' and just with his humble smile, he took my worries as well as guilt of not reviewing for the exams away. And oooh how I love the way he signaled 'time-out' to my group when asked to have a photo op with him before their feat. Grabe. Mong is too hot to me. HARHAR. The hair!! Wah! T'was like parang Naruto lang.:D joke! hehehe.. But I am dead serious, Mong really is the first among the band people to touch my heart. If you have someone who you really want to spend your life with [if given a chance!;p hihi].. well the counterpart of that someone in your life in my life is absoultely Mong. Promise.xp I can still remember the rockin' young Tsikoski days when all day Paris[a one.. a two.. a one, two, three, four.. chugchug tenenenenenenenenen haha.. speak now or forever fall into pieces] plays on my mind while picturing the way he rules over his guitar! A rgh! It's really been years.:))

Wah.. MongMongMong.:))

The man my dad fears, nyaha. The man that makes his little girl crayzee!! Mong Alcaraz and Ariana Criselda Obrero-Alcaraz.:D

Ang Tawag

2007-09-30T06:03:00.000-07:00

HAHA.. found this on my folder here[computer] where I save my journal entries.. too many secrets.=) I can't remember exactly why did I give a damn to this instance and named the filename of this entry as "DIMWITTED CALLER." Haha.. I guess I was just disappointed. I mean maybe I was expecting someone to call and yet this man ruined it all.

TOO FUNNY!!:)

august28,2007

Duh, the phone ringed and it was around 11:06pm. Yeah, it wasn’t that too late for there are times when I ‘m still up talking to someone over the wires later than that time but not at this phase, I tell you. I used to have an active ‘telephone social life’ as if only the telephone could save my relationship [semi-platonic kind. haha.] with someone and as if it is the only means of getting connected to him. And now using the telephone 'til my ears gone tired is one of the things I've been missing like hell.

Anyway, when the phone rang I immediately answered it. I admit, I felt a bit excited for I no longer usually hear the telephone ring this time of the night and I got so curious about who’s on the other line.

Then so I said, "hello.."
"Hello, 434-6426?" the man on the other line said.
"Yes, sino po siya?"
"Uhm.. Dito ba nakatira si Joanne?"
"Joanne?? Sorry walang Joanne na nakatira dito eh,"
"Ganun po ba.. sino ka?"

Err.. When he asked that he did really get on my nerves. Should I be the one asking that question? Absolutely! I should be the one asking that for it was our number that he dialed. Dim-witted!!

"Eh sino po ba sila??" I asked and I swear I asked him politely though I found his question prior to mine a bit annoying.
"Eh, sino nga po ba sila?" he requited.
"Malamang nakatira ako dito ano.." I said. Actually, I am so guilty of saying this for it didn’t sound really good.
"I mean anong name?"
"I’m Yang." I said my real name though hiding it came to entice me but still I opted to tell the truth.
"Ah.. so Yang? Nakakaisturbo ba ako sa iyo?" he asked.
"Eh teka, sino po ba ito?"
"Nakakaisturbo nga ba ako sa’yo? May ginagawa ka ba now?"

What the! His voice is quite familiar and until now I am thinking where did I hear that and for this yakult’s sake that I am drinking right now.. whose voice is that!! The voice made me infer that he’s on his late teens to early twenties.

"Parang," I replied. super annoyed.
"Ah.. importante ba ginagawa mo Yang?"
"Siguro.."
"So hindi kita makakausap?"
"Oo.." sarcastic
"toot-toot-toot-toot.." the sound I heard next.

Ngrrr.. Yes. He put down the phone immediately when I told him that I couldn’t talk to him. He is dense, believe me. I may sound so mean but if you were the one talking to him you’ll really get annoyed. Aside from the fact that he didn’t even bother to tell me who he really is and who the hell Joanne is, his voice is also s great source of annoyance. Haha, true! It’s like all of his life he is a drunkard who is dim-witted enough to do that. It really shows that he just doesn’t have anything productive to do and just diverted himself to dialing the phone and pretending to look for someone who seems to be a close friend of his and eventually having someone fall prey to his evil wiles and victoriously have an instant phone pal! Darn! Helluva trip!

Suicide Your Face

2007-09-09T06:07:00.000-07:00

Gusto kong tumakbo. Malayo sa'yo color black. Sa'yo rin megaphone. At lalong lalo na sa iyo polusyon. Hindi. Hindi sila mga tao, o code names. Totoong ayoko sila.. sa ngayon.

Black- problema.

Megaphone- boses niya*, nila.

Polusyon- usok.

Hindi ko ito inaasahan. Nagkasabay sabay pa ata. Nakakadepress. Saan ba yung daan papalayo sa kanila? Yung pagtakbo bang gagawin ko eh katulad lang din sa pagtakbo pag nakikipaghabulan? O kaya kapag itatakbo mo na yung bola papunta sa ring ng team mo sa basketball? O kaya yung ginagawa ng mga athletes? O pagtakbong malayo sa mga ideyang yun? Ito ba'y pagtakbong hindi kayang tumbasan ng kahit anong physical na activity? Pagtakbong pang emosyonal at spiritwal?

Ang duwag ko. Nakakaasar.

Ampf. Nakapanlulumo. Ayos lang sana kung sa estadong ito ay walang taong nadadamay bukod sa'kin. Hindi e. May mga taong naiipit dahil kahit papano; small time o big time ay naaapektuhan sila. Mas ampf kung wala naman talaga silang pakelam sa mga nangyayari pero xet.. nadadamay sila. Isipin mo yun. May problema na nga ako, nandadamay pa ako. Ang bigat sa pakiramdam.

biktima* na nga. suspect* pa. SAKLAP.

Konting panahon na lang 'e makukuha ko na diploma ko. Galing. Graduate na ako sa pagpapanggap. Best in pagpapanggap pa ata. Mas mahirap sa tunay na pag-aaral 'to. Hindi kasi ako nagdedeal sa kahit anong libro, website o sino mang prof. Tsk, emosyon pare. Emosyon at kung pano mo sila pepekein. Pano mo sila itatago at papalitan ng kabaliktaran. Ang bigat. Minsan naisip ko ng magdrop out pero hindi. Naisip ko kasi anong sense? May pakelam ba ang mundo? WALA naman ata.

Mag-isa lang ako sa labang 'to. Papanindigan ko 'to.. SANA.*

Pero malamang sa malamang.. baka joketime lang. Sus. Alam kong tatakbo at tatakbo pa rin ako sa kanlungan ng mga kaibigan ko. Tsss.. Para ano? Para umiyak. Yon, dun naman ako magaling. Hay. Ano kaya dapat kong gawin? Sa bahay parang iba na ihip ng hangin. Masakit. Hindi ako sanay at hindi ko alam kong masasanay ba ako. Yon. Yun na yun 'e. Yun pa lang, sa anggulo na yon pa lang eh parang pasan ko na mundo, pano pa kaya yung sa usaping ganyan at ganito? Wah.

Kailangan ko ng himala.** Hindi suicide ang sagot.

Tsaka hindi ako bobo. Suicide? Duh! Gawaing pang-epal lang yun. Tss, kapit lang ako kay Lord. Wah, ayoko neto. EMO* moments, argh! At utang na loob, hindi ako nagkakaganito dahil sa pesteng lovelife o dahil hindi ako nakbili ng ganyan o hindi ako binigyan ng atensyon o kung anu pa man! Tantanan ako. Pasan ko kinabukasan ko. [San ka pa? Gumaganun daw ako. Hahaha. Kinabukasan? Ngrr..] Bigat nun. Kapanlumo.

TULONG.* DASAL.* LIWANAG.*

Mong is Love

2007-08-23T06:02:00.000-07:00

aw.:) sweetest birthday..

this is so... -what? annoying for some i guess but this thing is the only thing that could really save me from feeling so guilty of having broken the.. blahblah. eek, the determinants of morality won't let me embrace inner peace because of that crime. harhar.. more to that! it won't let me forget the second part of philo 5's exam this morning. super darn!!

too glad.. mong is here to save my day! haha.:) i've been his slave [what?? haha.. kidding!] for years.. really. since highschool.. since young chicosci's days.. anyway. i just love his hands.. ya, his hands only! haha.:) mong really is a great guitarist.. a great musician..[reaching heart's mealting point.;p] awwww... tsktsktsk.. i know the world is annoyed already.. and i definitely don't care.:))

credits..**eekk.. robbed his pic from a multiply account.. tsk! it really goes to show that i am a true blood criminal! haha.;p darn robber!

MONGKEES

2007-07-21T06:00:00.000-07:00

Isang araw.. inayos ko ang mga bag ko. Tinanggal ko ang mga ilang bagay na nasa loob ng mga bag na hindi ko na ginagamit. May mga papel dito, may mga balat ng kendi, mga tiket sa bus, papel na galing sa apa ng ice cream, straw, malinis na tisyu at kung anu-ano pa. Kung tutuusin, napakababoy. Pero sa mga taong nakakakilala sa akin.. sanay na sila. Alam nilang napaka-sentimental-asukal ko kung kaya't nahihirapan akong itapon na lang nang basta basta ang mga bagay bagay kahit gaano pa ito kawalang kwenta sa iba.

Mabalik tayo, habang nag-aayos ako.. nakita ko ang mga *mongkeehs* ko sa isa kong mga bag. Sa totoo lang, di ko maipaliwanag ang aking naramdaman ng nasilayan ko sila uli. Mayroon kasi akong naalala. Isang tagpo sa buhay ko na alam kong dapat kong pagsisihan ngunit dahil sa lintik na pride na 'yan eh ayoko siyang tanggapin. Nakakatawa man pero niyakap ko sila. Niyakap ko sila na parang ilang taon kaming hindi nagkita. Kumbaga'y may emosyonal at spiritwal na tali na mahigpit na nagbubuklod sa amin.

Ano ba kasi ang naalala ko? Hmm.. Habang nakaupo ako sa aking kama na napapaligiran ng mga gamit na inisasaayos ko ay napatulala ako (lintik pa nga ang kantang pinapakinggan ko nun.. sapul!) Naalala ko ang panahong nabigyan ng kulay ang buhay nilang dalawa. Si Mongkeeh (A) at si Mongkeeh (?). Oo, sa katawan nilang dalawa ay makikita mo ang A at ?. Haha.. mga *beybies ko. Grabe, at dahil doon syempre hindi ko maiwasang may maalalang isang tao. Isang tao na hindi ko nakita ang halaga noon.. TO BE CONTINUED.

Wish Wish :)

2007-07-17T05:59:00.000-07:00

hahah.. ang wish ni sumigui ay wish ko na rin..;p chos.. haha.. talaga nman oh.. monday! monday! monday! monday! wahahaha.. biyaya talaga ang p.e...=) chika.. hehehe... saya... sarap sa mata..:) hmmmm....... tee_Eich lang..;p

Ay Hindi Rin Pala!

2007-07-08T05:58:00.000-07:00

Moments ago, while I was making my blog entry prior to this.. I was very much composed. I was super aware of what I wanted to do and of my personal perspective. But now I am a bit shaken. I fearlessly entered his* page. His:(n) the one I wanted to change his thoughts when it comes to me, the one I wanted to be aware that he doesn't mean nothing at all to me, the one I wanted realize that pride no longer has room in me. And what did I see? Yah right. Something that makes it difficult for me now to pursue the ideals that are stated on the blog entry I posted a while ago. I am not coward or the like but I just don't want to make things complicated. But there's still a long way to go. Let us see.

Tapang Ah!

2007-07-08T05:56:00.000-07:00

This time.. I wil take the risk. I will jump off the chasm and defy all the edges. There is no way left for me to give this thing up to the formation of stars nor fate.. for this time I should have this situation solved face-to-face. I can't rest my trust on signs anymore, no testings for now. I should be brave enhough to understand that this is my fight. I do have to invest time, effort and sacrifices. And no matter what happens in the end.. I should always stick in mind that I am never a looser. I always win. Why? Because everything really is just a matter of both faith and perspective. So all that is left for me to do is to have a real positive outlook. Thanks and glory be to God who is so sweet enough as He woke me up and made me accept that I am no frail for I had fallen.

Iyak Na?

2007-07-07T05:54:00.000-07:00

Ang luha ay pawis ng kaluluwa. Ito ay hindi ordinaryong tubig na lumalabas lang sa ating katawan na idinidikta ng biyolohiya. May emosyong pinaghuhugutan ito. May kirot, may saya, may pait, may ligaya at iba pa na kasama sa bawat patak ng luha na lumalabas sa bintana ng ating pagkatao.

Ano ngayon? Gusto ko umiyak! haha.:) Alam mo yun? Yung tipo bang gusto mong mag-inarte at umiyak kunwari? haha.. magpaka-senti ba.. naulan kasi eh. Sarap sabayan.. kaso hindi eh. tsktsk. asar!

Devila Akerr

2007-07-01T05:52:00.000-07:00

as of this very moment, i feel so high. i feel so supreme for i know someone envies me.:) sama ko noh?:p haha.. but you know world i am just being true to myself. after all, you don't know the sole reason why i feel this way for having someone realize that she's inferior to me.. hahah..^_^ ang sarap! solido..:))

yes, it really sounds so mean, so bad and all the like but who the hell i care? besides, what she has done couldn't really amount to the meanness i am exercising rightnow.. i am not after vengeance or what for that would just make us equal.. what i want is the view of being superior to her.:) yah! (palakpakan ang mga kontra-bida sa mundo!).:D sarp sarap talaga..

now, look who's bitter? look who's crying for a guy who didn't hold tight to the hands of a young lady who thought that the guy wouldn't leave her? hahaha.. eh di siya!:) wuh0oo!! i never snatched anyone from any.. remember that and i will always remind the world of that wonderful truth! grrr... i just hope she won't loose and waste her time thinking that this is a big loss for her though it is painfully true.. mwahahah!!^_^ sarap tlga.. biterrness xa? oemgee.. over me? more oemgee! haha..:))

hmmpp.. so much for this devilish yet asking-for-forgiveness yanggee..:)) Lord. laby0u ha.. soree... mwahugs!!**

Magaling na Kanta

2007-06-23T05:49:00.000-07:00

salamat sa mga kaibigan kong iniba ang words ng kanta..wwaaat?!?!

"dati ang gulay di ko tinitikman.."-->dati si ch0rva di ko pinapansin..

hmpfnes... sapul!!XD

Father's Day

2007-06-17T05:48:00.000-07:00

happy father's day!:) ay sori.. sabi mo nga pala dad.. *actionMan kita.. hihi..^_^

salamat sa walang sawang pagmamahal.. paglalambing at pag-iintindi sa nakakalokong anak na tulad ko. mahal na mahal ko ikaw! mwahugs..",)

ainku.. sabi mo nga sa akin.. "actionman mo ko eh.. pag sinabi mo gagawin ko agad." aaw.. super natouch ako nun.. awst.. hehe..

di ko alam gagawin ko pag may masamang mangyari sayo or something.. wah!!! super freak out!! hmmmp.. kaya lagi ka po mag-iingat! mahal na mahal kita!!:))

happy father's day!:) proud ako sa'yo!

Malinamnam

2007-06-10T05:46:00.000-07:00

nawa'y parati na lang sanang nakasindi ang apoy ng pasyon. nakakaaliw hindi lamang sa mga matang nangugusap kundi pati na rin sa mga pusong umaaruga sa mga bagay na nais mapadala sa lugar ng realidad. mahirap maiwang nakabitin sa ere nang walang laman ang damdamin. para kang isang nilalang na walang kasilbi silbi sa bayan at sa mga mata Niya. mahalaga ang alam kung ano ang mithiin. mas mahalaga kung ang mithiin ay malayong malayo sa mga iyong sarili at napakalapit sa iyong pagsuko sa mga gusto Niyang gawin mo, sa iyong papel dito sa hiram na sandali sa mundo.

wag sana tayong mawawala. tiyak naman ang tagumpay kung susundin mo ang liwanag at tatalikuran ang pang aakit ng kadiliman. wag tayo doon. masyadong masukal, nakakatakot at walang kasiguruhan. manatili sa Kanyang mga kamay habang tinatahak mo ang daan patungo sa samyo ng bulaklak na iyong maaamoy lamang pag inalay at ginawa mo ang lahat ng bagay sa Kanyang kagustuhan.

Old School

2007-06-07T05:44:00.000-07:00

t'was a very loud night of great fun and music

i was with a crazy nocturnal crowd who was so high in energy

situated in a place wherein things weren't drifted apart

shifting and turning ways that made the scene on the arena complicated

i was with him, yes i was

he, the person who at the lowest point of my life sends me up

he, the person who at the highest point of my life sends me down

we were together, only the two of us ignoring the crowd

turning each and every moment into tears of smiles ang laughter

never in my life had i thought that this would mean so much to me

a night, that until now i see the collage of moments when the rainbow appeared prior to the rain and sunk into the sea

---->found in one the pages of my journal 2005. stil thinking why i wrote that entry.. i have an idea but i beg and pray that it should not be the reason! haha.. that would be a super-come-on eat-mamon reason!:D lol. hell-ya! things are way different right now... it's 2007! two years had passed and during those 24++ months.. a lot of things happened. a lot of persons came.. few persons were imprisoned inside my heart.. numerous escaped.. a little few bailed out.. but all have touched me.

WALK THE TALK

2007-06-06T05:42:00.000-07:00

yes.. super fresh from another talk with my dad.. aun, lagi naman namin tong dalawa ginagawa..=) hihi.. as always lagi akong may natututunan though minsan sa mga jokes niya pinadadaan.. ai.. dadi talaga oh! kaya love na love ko eh..

hahaha..:D super stupid kasi pinagtatawanan namin ung facial reaction ni senator elect manny villar knina dun sa partial proclamation event.. err! para kasing kinikilig na kambing na may hiya-proud factor! hahah.. basta! alangan kay mr. sipag at tiyaga! mwahaha.. aun! tawa lang kmi ng tawa hanggang npunta sa kung anu anong usapan..

haii... di ko makakalimutan.. habang satsat ako ng satsat tungkol sa mga bagay na gusto kong maabot sa buhay.. isa lng nsabi nya.. "WALK THE TALK".. hmmpff.. bigat! pero nasa puso ko n ngaun ang mga katagang yun.. swear..=)

kaya daddy.. promise ko sau.. I WILL WALK MY TALK..=) laby00u..

Estudyante Blues

2007-05-29T05:40:00.000-07:00

i am a student of God. i am a student of life. i am a student of God and of the life He has sweetly blessed me with. i could find no means of gratifying Him for letting me be enrolled in His school where i get to learn so many important lessons that i could ever learn. these lessons are way beyond compare to the things i could get from subject matters like math, literature, english etc. for these lessons are my very own guidelines that would help me follow the path of my Mentor. these lessons are my necessities. i will never leave them until i get to this day when i already have to receive my diploma and show it above for the gates of Heaven to open anmd welcome me to a world with my Mentor so close to me for the rest of eternity.

p.s. sana di na ako mawala.=) ONE WAY!!

Sa Ilalim ng Impluwensya ng Tala

2007-05-24T05:39:00.000-07:00

for the past few days, ariana's life (as i view it) has been a series of laughter, tears, pain, sadness, happiness, excitement and all the things that could be attributed to the word; confusion. it's been a cold-hot mix of feverish elements yet down toner matters that if she was given a choice she would not indulge herself into. it's never been easy for her. i can see it. i can feel it. i know it. why? for ariana is in me. for that young lady is the same person i see whenever i look at the mirror. she is the same young lady i hear whenever i sing my heart out to songs that usually carry my feelings. she is the same person i listen to when i just let silence remain in my heart and gracefully listen to what it bears. ariana is the person i can call me, i and myself.

the days that had passed, the thoughts she was so deep into, the things she was seriously studying.. they all marked *something on her heart. *something that upto this moment seeks its way to finally appear before her being with clarity leaving vagueness behind. she's never been good in figuring out what she truly feels. if there's an academic placement for that matter, she could have been the worst and probably the teachers' no.1 enemy. her heart is so fragile yet flexible to the strikes and attacks her thoughts suggest. but i don't pity her and there's no reason to do so.

clinging vs. letting go.. a battle she had decided over and over again. and the decisions.. well, they were not constant. there was a point when she decided to stay and to find a way to clear things up.. days would pass then suddenly the decision of letting go would pop in. she decided to let go for there's a view in her that if she continues nothing good would really happen. and this scenario repeated over and over again. imagine the chaos it brings to this young lady's heart? imagine the confusion it brings? haii..

so here came the bout between truly missing someone and the feeling of wanting to miss someone. there were times when thoughts of him would suddenly appear bringing her to a world where there resides regrets. there were times when she would remember things she did with the person she ought to be missing and she would feel so bad as if she wanted to turn back time. but! there were times when she would admit to herself that she was not really missing the person at all and just enjoying the feeling of missing someone and remembering the things they did. there were even times when she voluntarily did this crazy thing and the sole reason was she just wanted it. haii..

haii.. but these things were just offsprings of a dreadful question that has been bugging her since the day her dad asked her.. "bakit parang absent ka na lagi sa pagtetext at sa paghawak ng telepono, anak? aba.. teka, malamang hindi si irene ang kausap mo sa phone. it must be someone, someone that caught your heart. naku, humanda siya sa akin.".. it was actually a joke of her dad but that joke made her think. it delivered her deep down to her thoughts as if she wanted to call all the life savers in the world to save a single life, hers. and that question is until now bugging her... IS LOVE ALREADY IN THE SCENE?!

haii.. she has to admit that she likes/liked him for it would be too hypocrite of her to deny it. she would not spend time with him and even go out alone with him if she didn't like him at all. is she already in love with that person? or again.. just playing around and just wanting to have some *emo moments?! haha.. terrible. there were moments when she just wanted to give in to that premiseshe's just suddenly realize that he's not worthy of that feeling. and to this very moment her answer to the question.. "have you fallen?".. is NO. but she is so open to the possibility that tomorrow the answer would be Yes. but there were times when

hmpf., but i am sure that ariana has so many questions in mind. there are a lot of questions she wants to ask but the notion of her becoming an assuming person hinders her to do so. she's so puzzled. but one good thing about her is that she knows where to run to. she knows where to seek refuge.. and that is in His arms. in His arms where there are no questions to ask. where she truly feels that she is loved and she truly admits that she is loving. may God bless her.

p.s. the guessing game is not yet over but there were times when she already called it off but she just don't know why this game loves her so much that it always wants her to be its participant.

p.s. part ii. "*tala's influence"--> *tala.. paramita's album. the entry was done while listening to the songs of paramita. yes, ariana had fallen prey to the wiles of the words of the band's songs. keso!

KAPIT LANG A!

2007-03-23T05:35:00.000-07:00

whew.. kahapon.. nagulantang aq..='| ung tipo bang until now eh parang nakalutang pa rin ak0 sa ulap.. whew! as in wheew tlga..

last sun. thea asked me if belivers could come and j0in them sa p0ol party nila to celbrate their vict0ry during the sports festival over the other batches.. so aun n nga.. at first i thought na g0 ang blvrz dun.. but ndi pla..

so we changed our plan.. instead, we met at mcd0 and headed straight to marjake's.. aun.. i was with dhes.. pa0.. kajo and jeydileen.. then humabol si kevin seth and through God's hands.. sa di cnasdyang pgkakata0n eh there was j0ycie..

haai.. the original plan was we'll meet to talk about the shirt printing that was loong been planned eh hanggang ngay0n 'di pa rin naaasikaso because of sch0ol eh ngay0n medyo free na.. then included on the plan was the amazing race and our line up of activities for the summer vacation per0 nag-iba.. wahh..

xet.. emo tlga kmi nun.. as in sabihan ng problema.. haaii.. nalulungk0t lng ako kz ung mga taong inakala kong walng pr0blema sa buhay eh mas mabigat p pla ang mga problema sa akin.. xet tlga!

una.. c dhes.?! xet.. mahl n mahal q tlga tong kaibigan q..=s i am super affected by the news she sent me.. as in! haaii.. di talga ako makapnwala.. per0 kea yan!!

tp0s mama jeyd.. halata sa kil0s at mga mata nia ung agonies n nsa puso niya eh..=s obvious n hirap xa.. saka kita sa mga plastik niang ngiti.. wah! jeyd.. dit0 lng kmi..

c j0ycie.. huuhuhu..=s bkit gnon?! haaaiii... ang tatag ng babaeng toh.. saludo aq! haayp..

c pa0.. haaii..=C alam kong may galit sa puso nea.. haaii

et0h pa! sa lahat ng mga ta0n..e t0h ung isa sa mga iniicp kong alang problema! xet.. as in.. haii.. c kajo.. waahh... ramdam ko ung agony habang nagkkwento xa eh.. andun ung mga elements na napaka unusual para skin na maas0ciate s knya.. sus!

grbe... gnon q lng tlga kmahal mga kaibgan q.. haaii..='| super lungk0t.. xet.. sana bigyn ako ng special powers ni God para matulungan cla.. hmmppfff... pra s knila?! y not? eh halos isave n rin nman nila ung life q. haaii..(;_-) pero kahit nsa ganitong stage.. alam naman namin na ndi kmi bibitaw..

alam kong ndi nila ako bibitwan.. at alam kong alam nila na ndi ko rin cla bibitwan.. ang kapal naman ng muka ko kung gawin kong talikuran cla.. haaii.. xet! ang drama.. grbe.. di ko lng kz lubos maisp n ung mga kaibigan ko eh hirap n hirap dahil sa mga problema n s edad nila eh tlgang nakakaloko..

mhirap makita clang pinaplastik ang mga sarili nila.. per0 saludo ako! xet.. ang tatatag.. sa mga panahong toh.. kailan lang nting MANIWALA..

Selos

2007-03-21T05:32:00.000-07:00

everybody who knows me personally is aware of the fact that i am such a daddy's girl.",) i love my dad and i am so close to him. everytime me and my girlfriends talk about our own ideal man.. i always speak of qualities that my dad possesses.. i always beg and pray to end up with someone like him.. with someone who'll make me feel that i am the luckiest lady for i have him just like what my dad does to my mom.. i know, though i don't hear it directly from my mom, that she feels so lucky for she has my dad as her other half. it shows.. it does through the air of love inside our home that has been maintained for the past 24 years.. the air of love that each other breathe.. the air of love that makes us all survive.

i can still remember when i was young, questions like this would arise.. "sino mas gusto mo!? si mommy?! o si daddy.?!" then i would answer without any hesitation that i would definitely choose my dad.. hehe. other kids would think first for seconds before answering.. others would end up saying.. "pareho" but in my case, i was very public when it comes to who i love more between the two. yah.. it's bad and it would sound so unfair to my mom who vested her best just to raise me but as a kid.. i knew no limitations when it comes to things. things were so basic.. if someone asked me then i answered deliberately..

as i grow up.. i became more close to him. i started to tell him my fears.. my dreams as well as my secrets.. he never let me down.. he never fails to make me feel so appreciated. haaii.. i love my dad! others would think that dadd'y girls are spoiled brats. they are those who feel so bad if something they want is not given to them. yes.. it may be true..it may be true for others but for me.. no. my dad is "dad" enough to raise me in a way that is incongruent to the former. he taught me simplicity as well as contentment. my dad knows the principle of discipline and that's what he had imparted on me though i couldn't really reach the altitude of his discipline.. whheew! so high! hehe... but seriously, i am so proud of my dad!(;_-)

dad is a civil engineer.. and i'll tell you! when i was young, i always felt this certain feeling.. it was more than being proud i know.. whenever i see the structures and the buildings my dad and his team built.:D i even boasted with my other cousins.. hehe.. now i realize how a kid could be so crazy saying things immediately as dictated by his or her thoughts.. dad is such a hard working man! i remember there was a time when dad's color was so dark for he had to mingle with the sun's rays as he worked on the job site. kewl, i thought but hell-ye it was hard.

he's just the gamelan amongst the noisy impediments of life. dad is the "man".. hehe..! i super duper love him that i always cry when he's hurt.. i feel triple the pain he feels. when he's sick.. i get so paranoid.=s whenever we have misunderstandings that reach to the point wherein coldness enters in the scenario.. aww.. my heart breaks as if i just wanna die. that's how i love my dad.. and nothing could change that.. i'll always stand by him.

now.. i am missing him. dad is not away.. i always see him but i truly miss him. these past few weeks.. our relationship just changed.=s it's very different.. huhu.. (crying infront of the monitor.. aw.. cheese) i don't wanna put the blame to somebody else and God knows that.. i know i don't have the right.. but i can no longer pretend that i am still okay.. i miss my dad.;C i haven't hugged him for days and it really pains my heart.. his hugs make me feel so assured that i am still his own little girl.. but now?! where are those?! did i loose my throne as her little girl?! huhu.. ashley is so innocent that i couldn't put the blame on her as to why this happens right now.. yes. i am jealous.=( haii.. stupid me.

RRRRR!

2007-03-16T05:30:00.000-07:00

march 16, 2007.. bd3p la n naabutan cdgc.. epal.. iba skedyul.. sus!=( kei lng.. believers! kita uli.. congrats rakh0unds.. init bus sinakyan namin mimin.. err! heater instead of ercon.. argh! basketbol. pao.. bolero ever! ceejei.. alaskador! dhesay.. sexy n tlga! jo.. haha! jeprox! nang uuto din. kervx.. may arw p ba?! lakas ng shades huh.. anton.. too glad you're back.. mama ria.. beliver n tlga.. haha.. mac.. ngpakita uli.. caloy.. nwala bigla.. sabbie.. lab q tlga.. mwa.. kathee.. blooming! siz ai.. wala!! cuddlez dun din xaya.. ate anna.. kewl..=) oders.. yeh! jeyd.. mish0o! chicken fillet.. sundae.. fries.. super dami catsup.. ash.. humabol..=) aral n.. finals.. err! kajo.. ride.. home.. sudoku.. kathee! sabbie.. syaw tau! dmting.. nytmare! nyak! labtok..=) kilig2.. tee_Eich.. aw.. haha.. katamd na.. saya lng tlga!!=)

Maligayang Bati!

2007-02-21T05:26:00.000-08:00

sabi nila.. sabi lang nila.. mas nagiging emosyonal daw ang isang tao kapag malapit na ang araw ng kaarawan nito.. grabe.. ilang araw na lang ba at kaarawan ko na.. sus! 3 days na lang 24 na..

siguro nga tama sila.. mas nagiging emosyonal talaga siguro ang isang tao kapag malapit na ang birthday nito.. ewan. ewan ko rin. haha.. wala naman scientific research o anumang patunay dun pero ewan ko talaga.. pero sa nangyayari ngayon, marahil eh tama sila..

wah.. huhu..+'| ewan ko rin ba.. parang these past few days.. bsta! pag pasok ng week n toh eh wala na akng ginawa kundi magreflect ng magreflect at dahil dun eh di ko naiiwasang magalit.. matuwa.. maiyak.. magsisi.. magngitngit.. mahiya.. lahat na! kahit nga mapakanta eh.. hmmppf.. pambihira! bitter.?! lab sik.?! hahaha... di nuh!!

weh.?! di ba tlga.?! sus.. aminin m n kz.. loser.!=p anu.?! kinain ka rin ng pride at mga salita mo nuh.?! waaaahhh... yang! paranoid k na naman eh! sbi nga ng dadi mo ''paranoia never helps anyone.." naku.. di tlga! never.. waahh.. hay.. brit in brit out.. sus! ano?! nagagalit ka ba kasi di mo napanindigan ung mga salitang una mong binitawan.?! naasar ka ba kasi ngayon parang na sa iyo ung spotlyt.. ung spotlyt na iniilawan ung mga taong talunan.?! haay...+( ewan k rin ba kz xeu.. aus nman ang lahat eh.. kaw lng nagpagulo tpos ngyon ikaw din ung talo...

sana bago ka magbirthday.. sna bago mag feb. 24 eh okay n lahat.. sana..:( kz aukong magbirthday ng mabigat ang pakiramdam q.. waah! sana tlga... sus!

Lovapalooza

2007-02-10T05:24:00.000-08:00

aww.. kakauwi k0 lang!:)) grabe.. ang daming ta0 sa m0a.. whheeew..! feel n feel m0 tlaga ang presence ng L-0-V-E.. haha!! lal0 n dun sa venue ng l0vapal00za.. ang xea xea!!:)) i g0t the chance t0 be with my BLVRS family again.. yeyeyeye!!:P i was with jeyd.. sab.. dhes.. janine.. mama ria.. kaj0.. j0yce.. ceejei.. pa0.. and lawrence..

grabe.. ang saya2 nmin.. ang valentine's day tlga ay di lang para sa mga c0uples! para din sa barkada! hahah..(",) ang daming mga twists ng day na t0h.. saya2!!

first, there was ang agreement n magrered kaming lahat.. then later 0n nasira ung plan c0z ung iba lang availbe n red shirt n susu0tin.. aw! natatawa ak0 kz c j0hann.. di nasabihan.. xa lang ang nakred sa gr0up.. haha! la lang kz natatawa lng nman..:P

s0 after eating.. we headed t0 the venue where l0vapal0oza was held.. guys! grabe! s0oo many pe0ple:P saya! kax0 n0t all pe0ple could go inside the kissing pit.. xempre may mga restricti0ns cla and 0f c0urse its f0r c0uples!:)) hahha... alam niu sa s0brang gust0 nming pums0k.. hahha..! we asked f0r registrati0n f0rms.. beliv it 0r n0t.. we signed up!:P hahahha!!! kax0 xempre n0t all 0f us had partners.. kahit partner kun0 lang! hahah..:P alam niu may mga ta0 dun n desperd0 nang mkakakuha ng partner! aliw! as in c0mplete un wid sign b0ards.. hahah! at muntik n nming kagatin ng 0ffer nila.. makaps0k lng! xempre i wanna see M0NG perf0rm live! but di n rin kmi tuml0y.. aun.. s0uvenir n lng ung f0rm! hahah:))

haay.. then dapt man0nood kmi ng m0vie kx0 d rin ntul0y.. hahah.. per0 kahit gn0n.. i was very happy! nagkasama n nman kmi! at least, ngay0n p lang masasabi k0 na.. na bu0 n ang heart's m0nth k0,, awww.. and its abs0lutely because 0f them.. wink..*

Hair Gestures

2007-02-09T05:22:00.000-08:00

ewan k0 ba.. haha.. nagpapatawa yata ak0..:) last m0nday.. umuwi ak0 sa bahay (xempre!).. pagka-uwi k0.. pinaalala sa akin ng m0mmy k0 na malapit na ang aking kaarawan-->feb.24.. medy0 malay0 pa nman, excited lang cgur0 xa.. hehe... s0 aun.. pagpas0k k0 sa kwart0 humarap ak0 sa salamin.. sabi k0.. 'haayy,, ang pangit k0!.. magbibirthday ak0 ng pangit!! hhuhu!!" tap0s, napansin k0 ang buh0k k0.. nawawala na yung gam0t na nilagay para sa kumul0t.. ibig sabihin kelangan k0 nang pumunta ng parl0r para ipay0s o ipakul0t uli..

s0 aun.. pagdating k0 ng parl0r--> wah0oo!!! et0h na ang pinkaj0ke time sa lahat! kmusta naman at nagpastraight ak0 ng hair! 0EMGEE!! nakakal0ko.. nakakapanibag0.. errrr!! imbis na nagpakul0t uli eh nagpa-unat.. asus! gudlak tlga.. di bagay.. anyway, kahit sa an0ng buh0k naman eh di ak0 gumanda.. haaay.... asa!! hhehehe.. per0 kahit gan0n... ak0 nman ay masaya..:)

kax0, ung iba inaasar ak0.. hay! kahit ak0 rin nman mism0 eh.. hehehehhe!!! namimiss k0 kasi ung buh0k n kul0t kul0tan.. hihihi.. di na kasi kelangan pang suklayin--> mwahahah!! super tamad talag w0h.. ala ng kalagyan.. per0 sabi nman nung mga sipsip sa akin at mga tak0t sa akin.. maay0s naman daw kahit papan0.. hehehhe..;P ainku.. bahala na sila..

basta.. 13 days na lang.. birthday k0 na! actualy, bday din ni alexis at ni v0t.. waah! happy birthday samin..:)

RANDOM MEEE

2007-02-06T05:21:00.000-08:00

your rights end when the rights of others begin.

i am happy when my dad is happy.

my whole being smiles when i am with my BELIEVERS family.

i talk and talk and talk and talk and talk whenever i am with my 1ca2 likod-likod bl0ckmates.

i cry becaus i get hurt.

i am mastering the art of faith for its my way to believe that i am living.

don't just exist, live.

i enjoy using cellphone when the messages are from or for him.

i l0ve because i am strong.

i pray for i believe in Him.

i write cause i find no rejections and no b0undaries in literature.

i dance for it brings my body and my s0ul to another dimension.

i sing because melodies fly me to the moon.

i get mad when my country is weeping.

i get jealous when someone gets to the other end of the rainbow. err.. impossible.

i demand for they don't care.

i live because soon i will die.

death is a personalized heaven.

heaven is a place where black is undefined.

yanggee is congruent to heart vs. mind.

Let God

2007-01-21T05:20:00.000-08:00

haay.. n0on.. i was asking for signs from God.. aun.. i mean parang yun lang.. gets.? yung tipo bang parang i won't listen.. minsan pag di natupad yung sign i would just psyche myself na maybe di ko lang naabutan or nakita.. yes, andun yung hesitation.. andun yung fear to accept things na hiningi ko naman sa Kanya as a sign.. yung tipo bang pag di natupad eh nahihirapan akong tanggapin kaya gumagawa ako ng palusot sa sarili ko..;(

per0 ngay0n.. iba na..;)) this m0rning.. i talked to my Creator seriously.. i asked for a sign.. i told Him na kahit anong mangyari eh i'll accept it.. it's all about asking a sign kung hahayaan ko na ba ang sarili kong mafall.. cause this time i want blessed feelings.. hihi.. yung tipo bang i want to love with his guidance and blessing.. so i kept on telling Him na i will listen.. whatever the outcome might be.. i will listen po talga.. papahalagahan ko na yung tugon niya sa sign na hinihingi ko.. so what was the sign ba.?!

well, i was actualy taking a bath when i ws talking to Him.. swear.!:) so sabi ko lang.. "Lord, after kong magbihis i'll go to church.. ako lang po mag-isa cause mom and dad will hear the afternoon mass.. Lord, if the tryk driver who will bring me to the church wears a shirt na ndi po red.. yellow or green ang color then its Your beautiful way of saying na 'Anak.. go! set yourself free and feel free to love again.. love the preson who's in your heart right now.. DO NOT BE AFRAID..'..." then.. naglaro lang sa isip ko na.. hmmpff.. cguro it would be better if the driver wears white shirt.. but di sya included sa sign.. naisip ko lang.. basta ang importante is neither of the colors red, green and yellow..

wahh..so when i was about to go.. i said "Lord, etoh na po.. i will listen talga.. slamat..".. i was actually nervous.. then i asked mang tomas to call a tryk for me.. wahh.. dug dug dug..!! kabdo.. then.. when i heard the tryk's sound coming closer and closr.. i closed my eyes.. pinagtatwanan na ata ako nila.. waaahh. the moment i opened my eyes... grabe.. napalunok a lang ako ng laway ko.. hahha... si manong hindi naka-red or yellow or green na shirt!!!! etoh pa....... nakawhite siya... shocks.!!!!:)))))

aun lang.. i am happy lang nman.. hihihi... ans ung sermon ni father... tamang tama eh.. he said.. "LET GOD BE GOD.." well, i just did..!!

Hindi Pwede

2007-01-14T05:19:00.000-08:00

sh0x.. this is s0 terrible.. swear.. i am n0t feeling well.. it's n0t because i am sick nor i am s0 tired of reading papers talking about media the0ries.. but it's because 0f 0ne thing.. i kn0w it is the reas0n.. waah!! a reas0n i want t0 escape.. 0h please.. (;_-) i can't breathe.. waahh... t0o hard..;'( a reas0n that i wanna share but it can't get 0ut 0f my head.. it can't be uttered by my m0uth.. it can't be c0mmunicated by gestures.. aargh.. i h0pe when i sleep.. dreams would eat this feeling.. and as i wake up t0morrow.. i h0pe t0 see life clearer.. just like i am n0t feeling this way n0w.. haaayy...

feels like i am tossed up in the air of questions and confusions.. i hate this feeling but i can't do something to escape.. minutes ago, i tried to forget everything through playing with my lil sis.. but it was a failure.. still i remembered things.. haayy.. now, as i l0ok at the things ar0und me.. i am feeling so d0wn.. haaayy... it's s0 hard when y0u already ass0ciated things with s0meone.. with mem0ries.. because a glance of them would already remind y0u 0f things and 0f pe0ple y0u just want t0 get 0ut 0t y0ur way.. it's hard.. i want me to have n0 pretensi0ns but in my stupid case right n0w.. it's s0 inevitable.. very inevitable..

It Shows

2007-01-13T05:18:00.000-08:00

.missing. deep. high. voice. solitude. far. expectation. surprise. bitter. regret. pride. sucks. hatred. progress. moving. motion. caught. where. when. why. how. who. tears. flow. from. the. heart. damn. spare. care. telephone. cellphone. prayers. messages. thoughts. texts. company. memories. short. complete. struggle. denoument. twilight. sad. angry. denial. admit. hard. can. not. wait. puzzled. confused. streamer. monkeys. love. fellow. dreams. hugs. dog. kisses. clipped. dancing. house. apple. banana. magic. sing. syndrome. music. piano. dance. envy. gratitude. stick. drums. dad. ice. cream. ghost. sob. first. jog. fit. mosaic. art. trap. stranded. painting. name. physical. stars. cd. move. vast. sea. ocean. cold. cough. mumble. huhu. stop. pretend. climax. occur. fries. jacket. kids. parents. bed. ill. sick. care. importance. touch. pull. live. fireworks. chucks. lullaby. waaaahh.. the. end. still. finding. error. in. connetion. hu. hu. hu.

Moon and It's Gravitational Pull

2007-01-13T05:16:00.000-08:00

..lately i just realized how important self appreciation is as well as the appreciation of inner beauty the world and the people in it offer.. and i am so glad that i came to that level of thinking and finally acquired the knowledge of things beyond academic background.. things that are far from book-based informations.. things that speak of importance.. things that make me write.. sing.. and dance.. =)) i am happy.. masaya ako.. GOD is there.. my DAD.. my family.. my BELIEVERS family.. my friends and i kn0w.. i know that wherver this person full of anonimity is.. still..he's there.. i may come to know him already.. or better yet if not.. well.. only time knows when.. only GOD knows who..

The Penguins and a Thriller and Us

2006-12-02T05:13:00.000-08:00

When i finally got home, the very first thing i did was i dialed this no.--> 4348362.. a girl answered my call and said "hello., sin0 t0h.?!" i already knew it was her so i just felt this certain freedom not to answer her question back and so i just kept on breathing and breathing as if i was having an asthmatic attack.. funny how that start went on because the girl on the other line, through my continuous exaggerated breathing, successfully got the notion that it was me calling her..

then she, my bestfriend irene, said "oh.. kamusta nman haaaa..?!" and that question marked the start of my crazy/beautiful confession.. ..

i was never really at ease talking about that or talking about him.. but.. errr! i was caught by my guilt as well as my wanting to take all of those idiocy out of me.. yes, it was total pride digestion! i can say that the stories, the things and the words that came out of my mouth during that 12022006night telephone conversation were all products of antics under the influence of drugs and alcohol.. really.. *wink*.. heheh!!

It just happened… I mean everything just fell into place including my irrational trepidations, stupid concerns and senseless apprehensions. But believe me, I never really saw it coming., swear.. being all alone with ‘someone’ in a vast sea of unknown ‘someones’ didn’t really come across my mind.. yes it somehow did for it would be too hypocrite of me to say it didn’t.. but hello?! Not to the extent or to the point that all of my tee_eich powers came out in just a snap..

Well then I guess it was meant to be.. I was cursed to suffer that angry friction between my feelings and my imagining of how gauche things would turn out to be.. but thanks to Him and to all my tee_eich models out there and of course to my bestfriend Irene and alexis that things went as smooth as the smoothest thing you could ever think of.owwss?! hhehehe..!. mwamwa! But guys.. there was absolutely no malice---in some point! Hehehe.. but you know., I just don’t wanna give the inncocent white canvass a stroke of malicious paint.. nyaaarkz.!